


This Side of Survival

by SophiaRemembers



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Civil War, Death, Escape, Grief, Hope, Human AU, Journey, M/M, Mute!Germany, Struggle, Survival, Travel, War, gerita - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-20
Updated: 2015-03-12
Packaged: 2018-03-08 07:46:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 18
Words: 27,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3201173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SophiaRemembers/pseuds/SophiaRemembers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(Gerita, Human AU) For as long as he can remember, Ludwig has not been able to speak and has therefore become rather introverted. When a Civil War strikes Germany, he finds himself forced to feel the country with his brother and an Italian named Feliciano. Struggling to escape the horrifying clutches of war, Feliciano and Ludwig cling to each other for comfort and support as they rely on each other just to survive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

 

**Chapter One**

                For as long as Ludwig could remember, life had always been the same. It shifted from time to time as he got older but he still got up in the morning, got ready for the day and then went out and did whatever it was that was needed to be done. That wasn’t to say that Ludwig hated it, in fact, he quite enjoyed it. He was comfortable living with his older brother, (even if said brother refused to let Ludwig work, saying he could provide for them just fine. Ludwig often made money by doing odd jobs around the house or around town) and he had long ago come to terms with the silence that had been granted to him as a young child. It was a peaceful life and pleasant indeed and Ludwig felt he had no right to complain.

                Rolling over, the blond man slammed his hand down on the alarm and sat up in bed. Gilbert was already up making breakfast if the scents drifting into his room was any indication. It was expected, Gilbert made breakfast almost every morning, save for the days when he was sick or Ludwig beat him too it.

                After leaving his bed, it took Ludwig only fifteen minutes to comb his hair, get dress, brush his teeth and meet his brother in the kitchen.

                “Good morning,” he greeted, his mouth remaining closed while his hands formed the words in the air in front of him.

                Gilbert smiled at him. “Great! You’re up! Would you mind running to the store for me today?” he asked.

                “What do you need?” Again his hands signed the words.             

                “Eggs, milk, bread, the usual,” Gilbert answered, the yellow bird chirping from atop his head.

                Ludwig glanced up at the chick, still unsure where the thing came from or why it decided to stick around.

                “Oh and something for dinner,” Gilbert said, interrupting his brother’s thoughts.

                Ludwig nodded, filling the plate he had grabbed from the cupboard with steaming food from the stove.

                He sat down at the table and a few moments later Gilbert joined him. “So any plans?” he asked.

                Ludwig nodded, putting down his fork to talk. “Mr. Aust would like me to fix his roof this weekend after that storm last week.”

                “Ah, well you have fun with that, I’m totally going to an awesome work party this weekend, you’re more than welcome if you finish up early.”

                Ludwig shook his head. He was never good with parties, they were difficult and awkward and all around avoided if possible.

                Gilbert seemed a little disappointed at his answer, but then again, he always did. Ludwig knew he wanted the younger to get out more, but Ludwig was perfectly content in his private world of few acquaintances and even fewer friends.

                “Heard the Havener’s were moving out, heading up to Denmark to avoid the protests and stuff,” Gilbert stated.

                Ludwig rose his eyebrows in question.

                “Said that the protests were getting too much. But it’s completely stupid if you ask me, the protests have been going on for months and nothing had really grown worse or any closer to us since they started. So what if there’s riots and the news people say that there’s potential for a Civil War? What do they know anyway.” He shoved food angrily into his mouth and Ludwig didn’t bother to answer.

                They finished breakfast in silence and after placing his dishes in the sink, Ludwig informed Gilbert that he was heading to the store and would return in a bit.

It was only a short walk to the store from his house and as a frequent customer, it only took him a couple of minutes to find the items needed. Dinner took a little longer to decide on as Ludwig stared at the shelves trying to make a choice.

While trying to decide between Beef pot roast or dumplings, the last thing he expected was for a smaller body to crash into him, causing his eggs to crash to the floor.

“I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!” The man switched from German to what Ludwig guessed was Italian and frantically back again as he continually apologized.

Holding up a hand, Ludwig, bent down and cleaned up what he could of the mess as the man stopped apologizing.

“Do… do you speak English?” he asked hesitantly.

Ludwig paused, debating how to answer the question, technically he didn’t speak any language but that was technicality he didn’t need to go into at the moment so since he did at least understand English, he nodded, dumping the mess from his hands into a nearby trash can and wiping his hands off on his pants, they needed to be washed anyways.

The man sighed in relief. “Oh good! German is so hard and I was sure you didn’t speak Italian, unless you do? Because then I’m really sorry for assuming—“

Ludwig shook his head, cutting the man off.

“Oh, then will you let me buy your eggs for you? As an apology for breaking them.”

Ludwig debated whether to allow it, but in the few minutes he had known the red-haired Italian, it was very clear he wasn’t going to leave the situation alone until he felt he had made up for it. So giving a nod he stared in wonder as a bright smile crossed the Italian’s face. This man was far too happy about buying eggs for a stranger.

As they headed to the back of the store for the eggs and then back to the register, not once did the Italian stop talking. Ludwig quickly learned that he was as he had assumed, from Italy. He was a student attending the local university through the exchange program and his name was Feliciano Vargas. He talked about anything and everything, from his classes to the friends he had made at school to the cat he had seen on the way to the store. From someone who couldn’t speak a word, Ludwig found him utterly fascinating. Never before had he met anyone who could say so much in such little breath. Honestly, he was surprised that the man didn’t pass out from lack of oxygen. Only when he reached the cashier and paid for the eggs did he pause in his narrative.

As they left the store, Ludwig turned to head back to his house, but was stopped by Feliciano’s voice.

Turning around again, he gave the Italian a confused look.

“I-I didn’t want to admit this,” he said bashfully, “But I’m actually kind of lost.” He laughed as if he was trying to make the situation funny. “That’s how I ended up here actually. I took a wrong turn somewhere and ended up here and I’m not really sure how to get back… So, well, would you mind giving me directions back to my apartment? It’s not far from the university so if you can at least tell me how to get there I can find my own way.”

Something told Ludwig that if the man had gotten this lost going where ever it was he was going, it would be pretty likely that he could find a way to get lost trying to get home from the university as well. Sighing, Ludwig pulled out a paper and pen that he always kept in his back pocket for when he needed to talk to people that didn’t understand sign language (which was a vast majority) and quickly drew a map before handing it to Feliciano.

“Oh thank you! Now I won’t forget!” he said proudly, smiling as he took the map and looked down at it. As he studied it his smile turned to a frown and he looked back up to Ludwig. “I don’t really understand it though.”

Ludwig sighed exasperatedly and struggled not to roll his eyes. He might as well show the man, it wasn’t like the university was terribly far.

Heading in the direction opposite of his home, he motioned for Feliciano to follow him.

As expected, the smaller man continued to talk the entire route, only pausing whenever Ludwig stopped him to show him a spot on his map where he had drawn a landmark and where it was in relation to their route.

It took about twenty minutes to get Feliciano back to his apartment and once there the Italian thanked him brightly with a smile to match and wished him a good day before disappearing into the building.

Ludwig watched the door for a moment, contemplating the strange man he would likely never see again. As he headed home, it quietly dawned on him that he probably wouldn’t mind running into him some time in the near future.

~~~

“You’re home late, it’s been over an hour,” Gilbert said with a frown as Ludwig walked in the front door.

Ludwig waves him off, placing groceries on the counter. “Got held up.”

“By what? A pigeon in the parking lot?” he asked sarcastically. “Don’t tell me you stopped to pet every dog on the way home again.”

“First of all, that was one time, second of all, no, I ran into someone that needed help. Well, they ran into me,” Ludwig moved his hands dismissively, turning to put the groceries away.

“Oh?” Gilbert asked, obviously intrigued.

Ludwig sighed and turned around to talk with his hands. “An Italian exchange student. He crashed into me and made me drop the eggs. Insisted on buying a new batch for me then admitted he was lost so I helped him home. He did talk A LOT though.”

Gilbert grinned. “That’s my little bro! Always the helpful hero aren’t we?” He asked.

Ludwig rolled his eyes, shoving off the arm Gilbert had slung around his shoulder.

“So you gonna see him again?” Gilbert asked.

Ludwig gave him a strange and confused look. “What does that have to do with this?” he asked.

Gilbert shrugged. “Oh, nothing, just wondering.”

Ludwig continued to stare at him suspiciously before answering. “Most likely not.”

“Do you want to?”

He didn’t answer.

~~~

As the sun was setting, Feliciano laid on his back, staring at his ceiling as the phone rang into his ear. After a few rings, the answer came in Italian and Feliciano answered back with enthusiasm.

“Lovi, you’ll never guessed what happened today!”

The man on the other end gave a small grunt of ‘what’ to urge him to continue.

“I met a man at the store today, he helped me home, which was really nice of him and he even drew me a map so it wouldn’t happen again. It has land marks and everything Lovi!”

“You got lost again Feli? That’s the fifth time since you transferred over to Germany for school,” Lovino chastised from the other end of the line.

“Yeah, but Lovi, this man is really strange! He doesn’t talk much, in fact, he didn’t say anything the whole time we were together!”

“That’s because you talk too much Feli, you probably scared him and never gave him a chance to speak!”

“But I did!” Feliciano protested.

“What do I care about this bastard anyway? So he helped you home, good job, it’s not like you’re going to see him again.”

Feliciano frowned, but not because of his brother’s negativity, but rather because of the truth he had laid out that Feliciano had not wanted to think about all day.

“So, how are you and Antonio? How is the trip?” he asked.

“It’s fine. Get off you bastard!” The second sentence was clearly not intended for Feli.

“Where are you now?” Feli asked, muffling a chuckle.

“Belarus!” The voice that answered was not his brother’s but rather the familiar voice of Lovino’s childhood friend and now boyfriend, a Spanish man named Antonio.

“Wow, is it beautiful?” he asked.

“Very,” Antonio answered, “But not as asphfms—“ His next words were cut off by what Feli could only assume was either a hand or a sock.

“Look, Feli, it’s nice to hear from you but this bastard isn’t leaving me alone, I gotta go.”

“Of course Lovi, it was nice talking to you, have fun and Lovi?”

“What?” His brother’s tone was a little flustered.

“You really should say yes.”

The other end of the line was silent for several long moments before Lovino finally spoke again.

“Good night Feliciano.”

Feli sighed with a small smile. “Good night Lovi. Good night Toni.”

“Night Feli! Talk to you later!”

The line went dead cutting off the last syllable of Toni’s departing words and turning the screen off on his phone, Feliciano crawled under the covers of his bed and with one last thought of the man from the store, he fell asleep into a dreamless sleep.


	2. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two**

The ringing in Feliciano’s pocket distracted him from his thoughts as he left the campus grounds on his way back home from class.

Quickly fishing the phone from his pocket he hit the call button and answered in Italian, recognizing the call as one from his brother.

“Hey, just wanted to let you know that we’re going to be in Germany next week,” Lovino explained.

Feliciano’s face lit up. “Really?”

“Of course really,” Lovino snapped back. “Why would I lie about something like that?” he asked.

Feli decided to ignore the question and continued, “Well be careful, there are riots and things starting up, the news says the tensions are building on both sides.”

Lovino let out a heavy sigh. “This is what I’m talking about Feli. News stations all over are talking about Germany being on the brink of a civil war. You need to get out of there while it’s still safe.”

                Feliciano shook his head even though his brother couldn’t see. “I am safe Lovi, there’s no war and all the riots are far away. I’m fine. I’m almost done with school here anyways, just a few more months. Besides, the news has been saying the same things for a long time now and things haven’t really gotten worse. “

                There was a silence and even over the phone Feliciano could tell his brother was still rather uncomfortable with the situation.

                “Well, just make sure the place isn’t a mess when we get there.”

                “Of course!” Feli answered his chipper attitude quickly returning. “See ya, Lovi!”

                “Yeah, See ya.”

                Feliciano ended the call and slid the phone back into his pocket as he walked the last few blocks with excited steps.

~~~

                Ludwig watched the news with a heavy frown set into his lips.

                “ _As of Tuesday there have been 6 reported riots in the—“_

                Ludwig’s attention is shifted to the front door as Gilbert enters and throws his work apron over the back of a chair in the kitchen. Gilbert glanced at the news and frowned at the display of people running around darkened streets, their silhouettes illuminated by great blazes of fire coming from store windows and perhaps a car or two.

                “What’s new?” he asked, it was clear he was trying to keep his tone casual, but he was obviously worried.

                Ludwig turned to his brother and spoke in his usual manner. “Protests and riots are getting worse and drawing closer.  Things are escalating and I’m worried.”

                Gilbert frowned. “Things will be fine, they won’t reach us, they’ll probably die out before they get this close. Anyway, if they bother to come anywhere near us, you’ll have your awesome big brother to protect you!” he declared proudly.

                Ludwig rolled his eyes and turned back to the news,  but at this point it had turned to the weather so he turned it off and tossed the remote to the couch next to him.

                Standing, he headed into the kitchen where Gilbert was pulling down ingredients for dinner.

                “How was work?” Ludwig asked.

                “Tch, it was fine, Liz was riding my ass as usual,” he said, referring to the manager of the café he worked at six days a week.

                “You probably deserved it,” Ludwig answered before pulling out the needed cookware.

                “Whatever, I’m awesome, her problem just is that she can’t handle it,” Gilbert retorted.

                Ludwig’s response was cut off as his hands froze in mid-air and a loud rumbling passed overhead. A quick glance at each other had the brothers rushing outside and looking to the sky.

                Three fighter jets flew over the city, much closer than what was probably necessary. As they disappeared behind the clouds, Ludwig looked to his brother who was still staring up at the sky.

                “We’re gonna be fine Luddy, just fine,” he said, placing a tight hand on his brother’s shoulder.

                His words were far from reassuring.

                


	3. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three**

The next week passed with very little incident. There were no more sightings of fighter jets and despite the growing concern from the news stations, things seemed to be pretty mild for the time being, neither growing worse nor calming down.

                When Lovino knocked on Feliciano’s door, the younger brother all but attacked Lovino with a tight and excited hug.

                “Get off of me!” Lovino cried pushing his brother back to the floor.

Antonio laughed and ruffled Feliciano’s hair. “Good to see you,” he said with a bright smile.

“I made pasta for lunch and then I can show you around town,” Feli said excitedly, showing them around the house as he launched into his plans for the day.

“Just as long as you don’t get us lost.”

“Of course not, we’re only going to places that I know well. Oh Lovi! You should see the school, it’s beautiful!” From here Feliciano launched into a detailed description of the campus where he studied, the same campus they were going to go see in less than an hour.

Lovino was going to say something but Antonio distracted him with a squeeze of the hand and a kiss to the cheek, causing Lovino to huff and his face to turn the same shade of red as the Spanish tomatoes he loved so dearly.

After a quick lunch, they headed out for the small tour led by guide Feliciano Vargas. Lovino was impressed to find the campus just as beautiful as his brother had described and after nearly half an hour of showing off both the insides and outsides of many of the buildings, Feliciano led them to other places. Some of these were popular tourist spots or hang outs for locals, others were just places Feli really liked personally and deemed worthy to share with his brother and his boyfriend.

As they walked through the park and Feliciano explained how it was here that he saw one of the cutest cats he had ever laid eyes upon, he stopped in mid-sentence. Lovino watched in confusion as his face lit up and followed his gaze to a tall, muscle toned man with a serious expression.

“That’s the man Lovi, the strange one who helped me home!” he said.

“Yeah? Well there’s no need to get so excited over it. You met him once and spent half an hour babbling at him, that’s no reason to consider him a friend of any kind,” Lovino answered but his brother wasn’t listening, instead, Feliciano was tugging on his sleeve, insisting that they go say hi.

Lovino had no choice but to dragged along and soon he was standing next to his brother as the younger Italian beamed up at the confused German.

“Hello!” he said with a wave. “Do you remember me?”

                It took a moment but soon recognition dawned in his eyes and he nodded.

                “This is my brother Lovino,” Feliciano explained.              

                The German gave Lovino a nod in greeting, looking unsurprised to find that they were related. This was not unusual to Lovino, it was very common for them to be mistaken as twins even.

                “And this is my brother’s boy friend, Antonio,” Feli said with as much pride as he had introduced his brother with.

                Now this caused a little bit of surprise to show up in the man’s features as he took in Antonio and then slowly nodded to him in the same greeting he had provided Lovino.

                He paused a moment before glancing over his shoulder and giving a small salute before heading off.

                “I wonder if he had to be somewhere….” Feliciano muttered lightly to himself before turning to his brother. “See, I told you he was strange. “

                “Tch, I don’t like him, just another damn potato bastard,” he said.

                Feliciano sighed. This didn’t come as a surprise to him, his brother was never a huge fan of Germans though he never quite knew why. Then again, Lovino didn’t seem to be a fan of many people. While he wasn’t as affectionate as Feli, he certainly cared for his younger brother a lot more than he did for most people.

                When they returned home later that evening, Feliciano turned on the news while he prepared dinner.

                “How long are you staying?” he called into the living room where Antonio and Lovnio were sitting nestled together on the couch watching the TV.

                “Just a couple of days, we leave the day after tomorrow,” Anotonio answered, but Lovino’s eyes remained trained on the TV.

                _“There are no updates on the fighter jets that flew over the city last week, but it clear that the riots and protests have spread further into Germany and tensions are at a peak.”_

Feliciano knew that his brother spoke very little German, but he also knew that he was far from stupid and so he wasn’t surprised when Lovino came storming into his kitchen. Focusing on the sauce he was heating up on the stove, Feli kept his back to his brother as the older Italian spoke.

                “Fighter Jets?!” he hissed, obviously not happy about learning about this repressed information.

                Feliciano didn’t say anything.

                “Feliciano! There were fighter jets and you didn’t tell me?!” he snapped.

                “I… I didn’t want to worry you and I thought you would have known,” Feli finally answered, turning to face his brother.

                “I told you you should have come home! This is getting far too dangerous Feli!” Lovi cried, a mix of anger and deep concern in his voice.

                “I don’t want to go. I promise you I’m safe. There haven’t been any more planes and there’s no riots or protest here. Please Lovi, I really want to finish out my school. I’m almost done, only a few more months. Grandpa would want me to finish.”

                Lovino sneered slightly at Feli. It was pretty brave of him to use their Grandfather as a reason to stay.

                “He wouldn’t want this, he would want you to be safe, that’s more important than your education, than anything.”

                “I am safe,” Feli pressed. “I promise that if things get too bad, I’ll come home, but as long as classes are going, I’m staying.”

                Lovino opened his mouth to say more, but closes it again when Antonio places a firm and comforting hand on Lovino’s shoulder.

                “We just worry Feli, we’re very concerned for your well-being and both Lovi and I just want you to be safe. But if you feel you’re okay with staying, we will trust you judgment as long as you promise to get out before things get to bad,” Antonio said softly.

                Lovino was obviously not happy with Antonio speaking for the both of them, but kept his mouth shut as Feliciano nodded.

                “I promise,” he said again.

                Antonio smiled but Lovino wouldn’t look him in the eye. At least he was no longer protesting so Feliciano took that as the okay to stay, even if Lovino wasn’t happy with it.

~~~

                When Feliciano left the campus the following evening he was surprised to find that it was later than he had anticipated. He had had a meeting with a group of friends after class and quickly lost track of time. He normally didn’t like walking home in the dark, it put him on edge, but in times like this, he didn’t really have a choice.

                Leaving the campus boundaries and crossing the street in the direction of his apartment, Feliciano kept an eye out for any suspicious persons. He hadn’t had any issues before, but things felt a little different than before.

                The feeling was explained as fighter jets made their appearance and flew quickly overhead, startling the poor student as he squeaked and picked up his pace.

                When guns shots sounded in the distance, and sirens quickly followed, Feli ran the rest of the way home, only feeling safe once he had his door closed behind him and locked with a satisfying click.

                “Feliciano?” Lovino called in concerned shock, approaching his brother. “What’s wrong?”

                Feliciano only shook his head, slowly catching his breath.

                “Feliciano, what happened? What’s wrong?” Antonio asked.

                Again, Feliciano shook his head. “Nothing, I just… got a little spooked is all. The streets can be scary at night you know!” He tried to laugh it off, but the sound that left him was weak and nervous.

                “But what spooked you Feli? Are you okay?” Lovino pressed.

                “Did you guys have dinner?” Feliciano asked, heading into the kitchen.

                “Feliciano!”

                “Lovino,” Antonio whispered softly in his ear. “Let it go for now, he’ll tell us when he’s ready. He’s obviously safe, there’s no need to worry.”

                Lovino huffed lightly but slowly relaxed. “Anything is good for dinner, I’m not too hungry,” he said, disappearing from the kitchen.

                Feliciano only nodded as he pulled pans from the cupboards and placed them on the stove.

                Antonio watched with mild concern for a moment before offering to help. Feli accepted with a smile and quickly put him to work. Antonio was both worried and impressed with the way Feli had snapped back, as if nothing had happened. He just wished things would stay that way.

~~~

                “Go straight to the airport, okay? There’s no need to stop anywhere and make sure you call me when you land. And make sure you don’t talk to anybody scary or suspicious and—“

                “Alright, alright, I get it, you’ve gone over this list six times since this morning. What has you so worried anyways? You’re being more protective than usual,” Lovino said with suspicion.

                Feliciano shook his head. “Just normal worry is all!”

                “I really think that you should—“

                Feliciano shook his head again, cutting him off. “I’m going to stay Lovi, I promise you I’ll stay safe,” he said softly.

                Lovino frowned but nodded and his brother quickly smiled.

                “Have fun on your trip!” he called as they loaded their luggage into the car.

                “Bye!” Antonio called from the back seat, waving out the window as Lovino gave Feliciano one last hug and climbed in the other side of the car.

                As they drove away, a strange sense of relief flowed over Feliciano. If anything did happen, at least he knew his brother and Antonio were safe.


	4. Chapter Four

**Chapter Four**

 

                Feli stared at his blank tv, refusing to turn it on to the news despite his curiosity. In the two weeks since Lovino had left, things had only gotten worse. The protests and riots were dangerously close to the city, and the planes flew overhead every few days. Feliciano’s classes had been canceled on account of the student’s safety, but were said to start up again in a couple of weeks when all of this was supposed to blow over. 

                The school advised all foreigners to carry a flag of their home nation to deter protesters. Feliciano wasn’t sure if something like that would actually work, but he had gone straight home and done it anyways, even went as far to make a white flag, the world wide symbol of surrender.

                He was scared, terrified even, and rarely left his apartment now. He wanted to go home. He had promised Lovino that he would leave when things got too bad, but something stopped him. Perhaps it was the hope that all of this would pass and things would get better, perhaps it was the fear to even make it to the train station or the airport. It was probably something he would never know.

                One thing was clear though, if Germany wasn’t already considered to be in a Civil War, it was pretty damn near close.

                Standing, Feliciano headed to the kitchen for food, only to discover he was out, he wasn’t quite sure when that had happened, but he supposed it couldn’t be helped. Glancing at the clock he noted that there was still a few hours before it grew dark. Day time wasn’t so bad, you could traverse the city pretty easily as long as you were wary and careful. When it went dark was when things were at their worst, riots and protests broke out almost every night and people were advised to stay indoors.

                The phone rang in Feliciano’s pocket but he ignored it. Lovino called at least two times a day since he left and Feliciano was tired of listening to his brother trying to convince him to get out, especially now that the guilt weighed down on him that Lovino was right, he should get out, get to safety. He had nothing to do with this war, this wasn’t his place.

                At last minute he answered the phone.

                “I’ll catch the train tomorrow,” he said, before Lovino had time to say anything. He was brave, he could make it to the train station, it wasn’t too far at least.

                There was silence for a moment. “Alright,” Lovino finally said. “Be careful.”

                Feliciano nodded. “I will, I will call you when I get out.”

                “Good. Bye.”

                “Bye.”

                After hanging up the phone, Feliciano sighed. Somehow knowing that he was going to get out put a renewed sense of bravery and energy inside of him. Still, that didn’t change the fact that he still needed something for dinner.   

                Sliding the phone back into his pocket, he grabbed his keys and wallet and headed out, making sure to lock his apartment behind him.

                Feliciano made sure to keep his head down as he headed to the store, watching his feet as he walked, occasionally glancing up to see where he was going, the only problem was, when he looked up at one point, he realized he had no clue where he was. Taking a right, he walked further down the street but still didn’t recognize a thing. Right, left, two more rights, straight on for three blocks. Still nothing. He had been walking for who knew how long, but long enough for the sky to start growing bright shades of pink and orange with hints of purple. He was growing frantic, his footsteps picking up as he took two more rights and another left before standing in dismay on the street corner. He had never been to this part of the city, he didn’t recognize a single thing. He no longer cared about diner, he just wanted to get home before dark.

                Feliciano just wanted to cry, but he held back his tears. Most of the shops were closed for the night so he couldn’t even go someplace and ask for directions. Taking a deep breath, he picked a direction and headed that way, already the colors in the sky were starting to disappear and the stars were starting to show themselves as they woke for the night.

                Keeping his pace quick but steady, Feliciano was tense and on edge and unable to keep a scream from his lips as a large hand fell onto his shoulder. He pulled his flags from his shoulder bag where he always kept them when he went out and showed them to the man as he turned around, holding them up in front of his face.

                For a long moment nothing happened, the hand dropped from his shoulder and pushed  the flags away from his face. Slowly, Feliciano opened his eyes and looked up to see an unexpectedly familiar face.

                “You!” he gasped.

                The blonde German’s face held apology, and they started each other a moment before he reached down and took Feliciano’s hand and began leading him down the street with a stern and determined look on his face.

                Feliciano found it amazing that this was the second time he ran into the broad German when he most needed him.

                “I’m sorry, I was out of food so I went out to get dinner and then I got lost and then it got dark,” Feli explained as they walk. Part of him knew he should be wary of the German, he could easily taking him somewhere to be a prisoner or something worse, but the rest of Feli said that he could trust this name that he still didn’t know the name of.

                Much to Feliciano’s surprise, instead of pulling up to his apartment like he expected, they came to a small house, nestled on a street corner. It was two stories and painted white with a red door. The man entered without knocking, pulling Feliciano with him and the Italian quickly realized that this house much have belonged to the German. But why did they come here instead?

                Closing the door behind himself, Feliciano slid the flags back into his bag and looked around, surprised to see a man similar in features to Ludwig but with startling red eyes and white hair, and a small yellow bird perched on his head.

                “Ludwig!” he yelled, “Where the hell have you….” The white haired man’s words trailed off as his eyes fell on Feliciano. “Oh? Who’s this?”

                Feliciano watch in confused wonder as Ludwig’s hands moved in front of his chest and face.

                The white haired man seemed to understand these movements as his eyes widened.

                “The Italian from before, then?” he asked.

                Ludwig nodded.

                “My name is Gilbert Beilschmidt ,” the white haired man introduced as he held out his hand. Feliciano took it and shook. “You know it’s dangerous to be out so late nowadays,” he continued with a brief glare at the taller blonde. “You’re lucky my brother found you and brought you here.”

                “I know,” Feliciano said, dropping their hands. “I just got lost, it was still day when I left.”

                “Yes, well, you’re welcome to stay as long as you would like. And I should apologize for Ludwig’s rudeness, he’s a nice guy and all but he hasn’t been able to speak since he got sick as a small child.”

                Feliciano blinked with a small gasp. Gilbert ignored his brother’s glare.

                “I just thought he didn’t like to talk,” he said softly, as if Ludwig wouldn’t hear him if he whispered despite standing right next to them.

                Gilbert shook his head. “He’s been like this for as long as he can remember.”

                Feliciano frowned and turned to Ludwig. “I apologize for making assumptions about you,” he said.

                Ludwig sighed and gave a small nod before motioning to his brother. Well that explained the sign language at least.

                Gilbert watched as Ludwig’s hands moved quickly before him. His motions were stern and with purpose, but had a smoothness to them and Feliciano was sure that’s exactly what his voice would sound like if he could talk.

                When he finished, Gilbert turned to Feliciano. “Ludwig says that you are to stay here until morning and then he will take you home. Also, you should get out of the country if you can,” he said.

                Feliciano nodded. “I’m catching a train back to Italy tomorrow,” he explained.

                Gilbert and Ludwig both nodded. “Good.”

                After a quick dinner the three of them headed to bed and Feliciano found himself staring at the ceiling of the guest bedroom on the second floor. Gilbert and Ludwig were each in their own separate rooms just down the hall and despite Gilbert saying it was okay to come get them if he needed anything, he wondered if it was really okay to disturb them when they were trying to sleep.

                The gunshots, sirens and occasional screams had become more and more common over the past couple of weeks, but for some reason Feliciano was having more trouble blocking them out than usual. After about an hour of tossing and turning he pushed from the bed and shuffled two doors down the hall and knocked, he waited a moment for the light to flick on and stream from underneath the door before slowly pushing it open.

                “I…. I can’t sleep,” he said softly, embarrassed and a little frightened by the noises outside the house. “C-Can I sleep in here with you? J-just on the floor of course!” He hugged the blanket and pillow he had brought with, giving the strong appearance of a small child.

                Ludwig stared at Feliciano, tired eyes squinted to protect them from the bright light of the lamp. Slowly, he nodded and Feliciano laid down on the floor next to his bed, quietly thanking him.

                Once he was settled, Ludwig turned the light back off and turned over to settle back into sleep.

                There was an awkward silence as nothing but breathing and the noises of riots from outside filled the room.

                After waiting several minutes to fall asleep, Feliciano turned over to face the bed.

                “Ludwig?” Silence. “Are you scared?”

                There was still no answer and while Feliciano didn’t expect one, something told him that Ludwig hadn’t fallen asleep yet and had heard his question. Sighing lightly, he clung to the gentle feeling of safety that he found came with being in Ludwig’s room and fell into a restless sleep.


	5. Chapter Five

**Chapter Five**

 

                A loud explosion woke Feliciano violently from his sleep.

                Sitting up abruptly, his breath came in mildly panicked gasps as he looked around the room. Ludwig was already pushing from the bed and running to the window to see if he could spot the source as Gilbert came rushing into the room.

                “We have to go,” he called firmly yet frantically, pulling Feliciano up from the floor. “Pack your things and I’ll meet you down by the back door. Hurry!” With that last command he disappeared out the door and Feliciano could hear his footsteps quickly descending the stairs.

                Feli watched as Ludwig grabbed a bag from his closet and tossed another one to Feli before grabbing clothes and a couple personal items before moving to the bathroom to grab what else he needed.

               Feli stared at the bag he had picked up from the floor after it had been tossed to him. He wasn’t sure why he had it, he already had a bag, and he didn’t have anything to pack. “What’s going on?” he asked once Ludwig entered the room again. Ludwig only shook his head and grabbed Feliciano’s shoulder bag and dumped out the contents onto his bed.

                “Hey!” Feliciano cried, but Ludwig didn’t respond as he took the backpack from the Italian’s hands and tossed in the flags, keys and wallet, leaving the school books and notebooks behind.

                He took the backpack in one hand and Feliciano’s hand in the other and led him downstairs.

                “Alright, let’s go,” Gilbert said.

                Ludwig took the bag and helped Feliciano into it.

                “What’s going on? What happened?” Feli asked as they rushed out the back door and into the small yard behind the house.

                Ludwig tapped Gilbert on the shoulder and mo+0tioned towards the garage.

                Gilbert only shook his head. “Riots are filling the streets, there’s no way we can get out with a car. We’ll have to go on foot for now. Besides, it’s better to keep a low profile this way.”

                Ludwig nodded, though not pleased with the news. He started slightly, looking down to find Feliciano clinging to his arm.

                “What’s going on?” The Italian tried again. This time he finally got an answer.

                “A plane crashed only a few blocks from here, my best guess is that’s it’s one of those fighter crafts we’ve been seeing that was shot down or had some sort of malfunction. The city is already in an uproar and I can only assume that it’s going to get worse as the night goes on.”

                This was not the news Feliciano wanted to hear and he clung closer to Ludwig out of instinct and his longing for comfort more than anything.

                “Where are we going?” he asked.

                Gilbert shook his head as they made their way down the quiet streets behind his house that the riots had yet to reach. Feliciano had a feeling that that was soon to change and they would be caught in the middle of it if they didn’t hurry. Already he could hear the shouts and gun shots from down the street behind him.

                “I don’t know,” Gilbert answered. “For now, we just have to get out of the city. Right now the country is safer than it is here.”

                As they reached the end of the street they could the orange glow and flicker of a fire that was burning around the corner. Gilbert motioned for them to stop before sneaking forward. Peering around the corner they were pressed up against, he quickly retreated and pushed them back.

                “Too dangerous, “ he muttered. “This way.” He led them in a different direction and so it continued for the next half hour, sneaking around buildings, avoiding riots and as many people as possible. It was surprisingly easy, most people either took cars, were in the riots, had already escaped or taken another route to do so. They occasionally ran into another person or family trying to get out of town, but it was rare and soon they found themselves on an abandoned street. Fires blazed from store windows and cars and a couple bodies scattered the streets. The trio tried to turn a blind eye as Gilbert led them into a store that had the front door twisted on its hinges and a few broken windows but otherwise seemed untouched.

                “We can’t steal!” Feliciano hissed, unsure why he felt the need to whisper now. He watched as Gilbert took food, water and medical items from the shelves. He paused to look at Feli.

                “We’re in war Feliciano, you’re going to have to have to start checking your morals. We’re only taking what we need and besides, at this point we’re not going to get in trouble. The police are too busy with the riots and this place has been ditched already.”

                Feliciano frowned. He didn’t like it, but he knew Gilbert was right. After a moment longer of hesitation he slid the back pack from his shoulders and started filling what room he had left with water and bandages.

                Shrugging the heavy bag back onto his shoulders again, Feli waited for the others to finish before following them back out onto the street.

                “Hey! You! Stop!” The three of them froze, turning to find a man, his clothes burnt and his face smeared with ash and soot, pointing a gun at them.

                Feli squeaked slightly, shifting slightly to hide behind Ludwig’s broad frame.

                “Hand over the bags!” The man called, motioning to the backpacks with the gun, causing Feliciano to jump.

                “Look man, there’s plenty of food and everything else left in the store,” Gilbert explained, his hands up in surrender.

                “I don’t want that, I want your bags, just hand them over!” he cried. Feliciano quickly came to the conclusion that this man was completely crazy.

                Gilbert growled. “You can’t have them,” he said firmly.

                When it was clear the man wasn’t going to back down, Gilbert launched forward grabbing the man by the wrist and pushing him to the ground. A shot fired and Feliciano buried his face in Ludwig’s back. Somehow, Gilbert managed to free the gun from the man’s hand and with a swift strike to the head with the butt of the weapon, the man fell unconscious to the ground.

                With a brief nudge of his foot to make sure the man was actually out, Gilbert turned to Ludwig and Feliciano with a proud grin. “Told you your awesome brother would protect you!”

                Feliciano moved from behind his human shield as Ludwig asked Gilbert if he was alright.

                “Yeah, I’m fine. Such a wimp couldn’t hurt someone as awesome as me,” he answered, waving off the concern. He checked the gun and was pleased to find it full other than the one shot that was fired. Flipping on the safety, he knelt down beside the man and felt inside pockets before finding what he was looking for. Pouring the bullets into his pockets for later use, he stood once more.

                “Let’s go.”

                The other two nodded and followed him down the street.

                They traversed the city easily, occasionally they were cut off by a group of rioters and one time they had a close call where they were spotted and had to run into a narrow alley as the rioters ran by in search of them. Once the coast was clear, they were back on the streets, sticking close to the shadows as they headed for the edge of the city.

                Finally, within the next hour they were out of the shadows of the buildings and the heat of the fires and into the coolness of the open night air.

               A small sense of relief passed over the group and their frantic pace slowed a little the further they got from the city. A few minutes later they found a small grove of trees and slipped themselves inside, feeling a little safer to be hidden by the trunks and branches.

                “There’s still a couple hours until the sun comes up again,” Gilbert said as they all dropped their bags to the ground and sunk against the trees. “Get some rest you two, I’ll take the first watch, we head out at first light.”

                Feliciano quickly found that, despite, or perhaps because of it, he was far too tired to protest and after trying different angles with the backpack, he decided just to use his arms as a pillow and cleared an area so that it was nothing more than grass and dirt and settle down to sleep. He watched Ludwig do the same and as Gilbert stood to go lean against the tree and watch the road through the gaps in the trunks. Moments later his lids drifted closed and everything went dark.


	6. Chapter Six

**Chapter Six**

_Fire surrounded him. He could feel the heat as the flames licked at his skin. Panicked coursed through him as he spun in frantic circles, looking for an escape. There were explosions and screams and the roar of a plane’s engine but all he could see was the high reaching flames that surrounded him. Coughing and covering his mouth with his arm, he peered through the smoke to see a familiar face._

_“Lovino!” He choked on the smoke and his voice came as nothing more than a hoarse whisper._

_“You promised!” Lovino called back. Somehow Feliciano was able to catch it clearly before Lovino started to scream, his body enveloped by the flames before disappearing._

_“No!” Feliciano turned to see the same happen to Antonio as well. Spinning around again, Gilbert and Ludwig were next and finally Feliciano fell to his knees and placed his hands over his ears, screaming and sobbing in fear and grief, begging the flames to just take him already._

Feliciano woke with a start, a strange noise breaking him from his nightmare. It took him a few moments to settle back down into reality before he realized that the noise was actually his phone ringing.

                “H-hello,” he asked, swallowing in attempt to clear his dry throat and steady his shaking voice. He ran a hand through his hair and looked around as he took a deep breath. It was just coming on morning, miraculously, he had managed not to wake Ludwig and Gilbert was off a little ways on his own phone is a hushed conversation.

                “Thank God, Feli!”

                Lovino’s voice reminded Feliciano that he was on the phone.

                “Where the hell have you been? The plane crash is all over the news! Are you alright? Tell me you got out,” Lovino cried into the phone.

                “Y-yeah. I’m fine, I’m fine,” Feli answered, swallowing again. “I got out, we got out. I’m safe Lovi. I’m with Gilbert and Ludwig.”

                “Who?”

                “The man who helped me home and his brother,” Feliciano explained.

                “Right,” said Lovino, obviously not pleased.

                “Are you two alright?” Feli asked, starting to feel a little calmer.

                “Of course we’re alright, we’re not the ones caught in the middle of a fucking Civil War that has nothing to do with us. Get out of there Feli. The protests and riots have grounded all planes and shut down all trains out of Germany, but you can find a ride, just get out, we’ll meet you.”

                Feliciano nodded. “Alright fratello,” he said softly.

                “And Feli. I may not like the bastard, but make sure you stick with that Ludwig guy alright? He looks pretty tough and you’re probably better off with him then you are on your own.”

                “Yes Lovi.”

                There was a scuffle on the other line and soon Antonio’s voice came through the speaker. “Most of all Feli, make sure you stay out of the war path, stay safe and avoid trouble. Remember, you can’t trust anybody other than those you are with now, alright?”

                Feliciano nodded. “I understand.”

                Lovino came back on the line. “Alright, call again when you get the chance, keep us updated. And Feli, don’t head North, it’s far too dangerous with all the fighting going on up there.”

                “Yes Lovino.”

                “Stay safe, fratello.”

                “I will.”

                Neither of them bothered to say good bye as they ended the call. Feliciano slid the phone back into the pocket of his pants before standing and stretching.

                Gilbert came back to join their tiny group a few moments later and quickly woke his brother.

                Ludwig woke easily with little protest and within seconds was standing and alert.

                “Alright, I have a plan,” Gilbert stated as Feliciano stepped closer to listen. “Denmark is closest, but the strongest area of the war is north, between us and the Danes. The Riots are spreading east so I got a hold of my friend in France and he said we can take refuge with him.”

                Ludwig frowned, concern clear in his features and the way he moved his hands.

                “I know it’s far, especially on foot, but it’s our best option right now. At least in France we have somewhere to go instead of being left stranded in some refugee camp,” Gilbert responded. “Hopefully we’ll be able to jack a car or get a ride, but it’s not likely, you can’t trust anyone now. Once we cross the border we can catch a ride to Paris and meet him there.”

                Ludwig moved his hands again and Gilbert watched with a small nod of understanding.

                “He’ll meet us at the border if we can get a hold of him, but for now we can’t give him an accurate account of when we’ll be there so it’s better to just meet him in Paris,” Gilbert answered. “And it’s very likely that for here on out, places to charge our phones are going to be sparse so distant communication is going to be very rare.”

                Ludwig and Feliciano nodded. He would have to let Lovino know but he was uncertain whether that would make his brother’s worry better or worse.

                “Are all in agreement?” Gilbert asked.

                The other two nodded once again.

                “Good, then let’s eat real quick and head out,” he said.

                They pulled a few snack bars out of their bags before slinging them onto their backs. Making their way back to the rode, they ate and walked in silence as the sun slowly rose higher and higher into the sky.

                For several hours not a word was said. A couple times a fighter jet flew overhead, causing Feliciano to jump and scream and all of  them to rush to the cover of the roadside, but the planes either did not see them or did not care and moments later they were walking once more.

                As evening started to approach, the trio found themselves in a small town. Their footsteps echoed off the buildings and small streams of smoke were all that were left of what they were sure were once grand fires. The whole place was eerily dead and quiet, several dead bodies were scattered across the street and the stench was unbearable. They tried to ignore it all and just make it through, but Feliciano quickly found himself growing sick.

                “Where is everybody?” he asked weakly, covering his face with his sleeve and making sure to concentrate on the color of the houses they passed and not on the bodies they were carefully avoiding and giving as wide of a birth as possible.

                “Dead,” Gilbert said with grim bluntness. “Or escaped. If anybody is here, they’re hiding, come on, the faster we get through here, the better.”

                Feliciano couldn’t agree more, picking up his pace to keep up with the brothers.

                _White. White. Green. White. Grey. Blue. Grey. Thud._

Feliciano stumbled over a large mass in the street, scraping his knees and palms as he caught himself on the pavement. It didn’t take him long to discover what it was he had tripped over and with a small cry, scrambled away as quickly as possible. His stomach churned and he turned back over just in time to spill the contents of it to the ground below. He coughed and spit, gagging slightly. He started a little when a firm hand was placed on his back. He looked up to see Ludwig looking at him in concern.

                Feliciano took Ludwig’s other hand as it was offered to him and stood. He didn’t say he was fine, he clearly wasn’t, but he could give Ludwig some semblance of comfort.

                “I’ll be better when we get out of here,” he said, wiping his mouth on the back of his sleeve. Ludwig offered him a bottle with a nod and Feliciano took it washing his mouth out quickly before handing the bottle back, which Ludwig slipped back into the side pocket of his bag.

                They started their way out of the town once more, this time with Feliciano clinging to Ludwig’s arm for comfort and guidance as he kept his eyes ahead and off the ground.

                It didn’t take much longer for them to leave the disturbing sight behind and once they were clear of the sickening sights and smells, Feliciano slowly released his grip on Ludwig’s arm, taking deep breaths of the fresh air.

                They walked for several more hours in silence and before long, the sky was ablaze with neon pinks, oranges and purples.

                As Feliciano was starting to wonder if they would set up camp soon, a sound disturbed the monotonous sounds of breathing and steady footsteps that he had already grown used to.

                The sound came again and the trio looked ahead to see a man lying on the side of the road, small groans disrupting the silence.

                They rushed forward, Gilbert reaching him first.

                “Sir, are you alright?” he asked in German. Already dropping his bag to the ground and opening it up.

                Feli came up a moment later and gasped, hands flying to his face. The man was missing a leg from just above the knee down, thick blood stained the grass beneath him and caked his clothes as it mixed with the dirt there.

                “Help me….” The man gasped in German, reaching for Gilbert.

                “Just hold on sir, I have bandages here,” Gilbert replied, searching around his bag for the medical supplies.

                “No… You have a gun… don’t you son? End it.”

                Gilbert froze. “But…” he said. The gun suddenly felt hot where it was tucked into the front of his pants and hidden by his shirt. Slowly he reached for it, hands shaking. He managed to pull it from the waist band of his pants before Ludwig yanked him back.

                Gilbert grunted, falling back onto the road. “What the hell Lud!” he cried, standing, gun still in hand.

                “What the hell yourself Gil!” Ludwig signed back angrily. “You’re not actually going to shoot him are you?!”

                “He asked for it!” Gilbert snapped back. “The man is slowly bleeding out, he’s in pain and it’s only a matter of time before he’s dead anyways! I don’t want to do it, but it’s better for him this way!”

                “Are we already at this point? Shooting people out of pity? The war’s barely started!”

                Gilbert growled. “We’ve always been at this point Ludwig!” he hissed. “And in case you’ve forgotten, it may have just reached us, it may have just hit its peak, but this war has been going on for _months._ Just because we’re part of it now doesn’t change the fact that people have already died in this war.”

                Ludwig was still for a moment, glaring before glancing over at the man as Feliciano knelt by his side.

                “Guys, he’s dead,” he said softly.

                The brothers paused, a brief sadness passing over them as they turned and watched Feliciano reach into the front pocket of the man’s shirt and pulled a blood stained picture from his front shirt pocket. He stared a moment at the picture of a woman and two kids, a boy and a girl, before slipping it into his front pocket, whispering a few words in Italian and standing.

                They move on, walking another hour before setting up camp in the trees to the side of the road. They build a small fire and cook a meager dinner from the contents of their bags.

                Feliciano watches the small flames flicker and his nightmare comes flooding back. Rubbing his eyes, he swallows and turns to Gilbert to start a conversation in an attempt to distract himself.

                “How long will it take to get to France?” he asked.

                “At this rate, a few weeks if we can’t get a ride,” Gilbert answered with a small frown.

                Ludwig signed something from across the fire and Gilbert nodded. “Yeah, faster would be good, but there is only so fast we can go on foot.”

                “How did you meet this friend in France?” Feliciano asked, changing the subject.

                Gilbert smiled. “Several years ago, I was a touring the country and I stayed in Paris for a week. Francis worked at the cafe right next to the hotel I was staying in and we hit it off instantly.” He laughed lightly, and it warmed Feliciano’s chest to see him so carefree after everything that had happened, if only for a moment. “ He was the biggest flirt I had ever met, man, woman, it didn’t matter, he found everybody attractive and was always upping the charm. Didn’t bother me though, I saw him every morning when I went in for my coffee and often stayed for an hour or two just talking to him around customers. It only took a couple days for us to become good friends and before I left I got his number and address and we’ve kept in contact ever since.”

                “Have you seen him since?”

                “Yeah, I’ve gone down a couple times to visit,” Gilbert answered.

                He looked like he wanted to say more but gun shots echoed in the distance and instantly he was throwing dirt on the fire, putting it out.

                “Ludwig, you have first watch,” he said, stomping the dirt firmly into the fire.

                Ludwig nodded, agreeing without argument as he went to get a good position to keep watch.

                “Get some rest Feli, you have watch after Ludwig,” Gilbert said gently.

                “Alright,” the Italian replied, moving to get ready for bed.

                There was a fair amount of shuffling as everyone got settled, but soon they were left with the silence once again.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Chapter Seven**

                Feliciano watched as the sunlight started to filter through the trees, growing closer to their hide out as the minutes wore on. He watched the road through the trees, tensing every time a car drove by or a plane flew overhead. It wasn’t exactly common, but it happened enough to keep him awake, alert and on edge.

                Since that gunshot they had heard right after dinner, no more sounds of battle had been heard. Still, Feliciano held the Italian flag and the while flag he had made in one hand as he stared at the picture he had taken from the dead man the day before. He wondered if he could find the family and return the picture, part of him hoped when all of this was over that he could.

                There was a shuffling close by and Feliciano tensed briefly only to find that it was Ludwig coming over to sit down next to him. Relaxing again he gave the German a brief smile before looking back at the picture.

                “Should we wake Gilbert as well?” he asked.

                Ludwig shook his head, glancing at the picture.

                Feliciano didn’t look up as he asked another question.

                “Do you think this war will be over before we reach the border?”

                There was a shuffling again and Feli looked over to see Ludwig reach into his pocket to pull out a small notebook and a pen.

                Feliciano blinked in mild shock. “Do you always have that with you?”

                Ludwig nodded as he wrote down a response to the Italian’s previous question.

                _‘No. But we can hope.’_

Feli read the words quickly and nodded. “Yeah. I’m hoping really hard. We hope a lot of things, don’t we Ludwig?”

                He nodded.

                “I hope this war ends soon, and that we make it to France safely. I hope I can find this family and tell them that he was a very brave person. I hope we end up happy after all of this.”

                Ludwig stared at him for a moment before turning back to his notebook and scratching in three quick words and showing them to Feliciano.

                _‘You are different.’_

Feli looked up at him with concern. “What do you mean? Different how? Is that good or bad?” he asked.

                Ludwig wrote down a few more words before letting Feliciano read.

                _‘Good, I think.’_

                This seemed to relax him a little and he smiled lightly. “Well that’s good. Lovino says I can be really annoying and that I talk too much and that sometimes I make assumptions when I really shouldn’t be,” he said, there was a hint of sadness in his tone. “I just wish we could find a car,” he said, changing subjects rather abruptly. “Then we could get to the border much quicker.”

                _‘Even if we found one, none of us know how to hot wire it. It will be pure miracle if we find one with gas and keys in it.’_

Feli sighed. “I know, but can’t we catch a ride?” he asked.

                _‘If we can find someone to trust. But I doubt Gilbert will even let us try. Not many people around anyways, especially with vehicles.’_

The younger man frowned. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. Even Antonio and Lovi told me not to trust anyone but you and Gilbert,” he said softly.

                _‘They’re smart.’_

“Yeah, they are.”

                There was a bit of silence before Ludwig turned the page on his note book and flipped it over to write on the back.

                ‘ _Feli, how old are you?’_

Feliciano looked a little taken aback, either by the use of his nickname or the question itself, Ludwig couldn’t be sure.

                “I’m 22, what about you?”

                ’ _23, Gil is 25.’_

Feliciano smiled. “we’re not too far off then are we?” he asked.

                Ludwig simply shrugged.

                They sat in comfortable silence for a bit before Feliciano broke it once more.

                “Ludwig, what do you want to do when we get to France?” he asked.

                Ludwig seems mildly surprised by the question and takes a moment to answer.

                _‘I would like to try the food and see the historical landmarks.’_

Feliciano smiled and nodded. “Me too. Have you ever been to France, Ludwig?” he asked.

                Ludwig shook his head before quickly writing in his notebook.

                _‘I’ve never left Germany.’_

“Wow, really?” Feliciano asked. “I’ve only been a couple times when I was really little and my Grandpa was still alive. He liked to travel the world so I’ve been to a lot of places I don’t remember. You know what Ludwig? When we get to France let’s go see the landmarks together and we can try the food too. It’ll be so much fun, you and me and Gilbert and then I can show you my home in Italy. There won’t be any wars there Ludwig, just sunshine and tomatoes and lots and lots of pasta. I just want to be somewhere safe Ludwig.” His voice dropped from that of excitement down to one of longing with the last sentence and Ludwig found himself reaching out to silently comfort the man with a soothing pat on the shoulder.

                Ludwig didn’t write down his reply, but Feliciano knew he agreed.

                “Should we wake Gilbert now?” he asked. The sun was clearly over the horizon now and it was easily to see everything in the small area they had taken shelter in for the night.

                Ludwig nodded and they both stood. Ludwig went to wake his brother as Feliciano pulled something out of his backpack for breakfast.

                As the followed the road, they walked along side it this time, making it easier to dive into the trees and hide if needed.  There weren’t as many cars as there were before, but every few hours or so they would dive into the trees.

                “Why do we have to hide everything a car comes by?” Feliciano asked.

                “Because we don’t know what side they’re on. It’s safer this way, you never know who’s going to pull a gun and shoot you in the head nowadays,” Gilbert replied.

                “What side are we on?” Feli asked, looking to either of the brothers for an answer.

                “Neither, we’re on our own side, just like all the other people who are trying to escape this damn war.”

                “What side is that?”

                “The side of survival. We don’t care about who wins or loses, we care about surviving, about making it out of this safe,” Gilbert answered.

                Feliciano thought about that for a while as they walked for a few more hours in silence.

                As it started to grow dark once more, Gilbert suggested that they start looking for a place to set up camp. The other two agreed when Feliciano noticed something not too far off.

                “Hey, what’s that?” he asked, pointing.

                “Looks like smoke,” Gilbert answered.

                Before they could stop him, Feliciano was running off in the distance of the grey cloud that rose up from the ground.

                The German brother’s chased after him, only catching up once Feli stopped at the bottom of a hill, the smoke clearly coming from the other side.

                “You can’t run off like that Feli!” Gilbert reprimanded.

                Ludwig added to the comment with a firm pound to the head.

                “Hey!” Feli cried softly.

                A familiar sound rose over the hill and they tensed, slowly turning in the direction of the sound. It slowly grew louder, fiercer and soft voices could be heard as well. No one dared to move. 


	8. Chapter Eight

 

**Chapter Eight**

               

                The shrillness of the baby’s cry was enough to have Feliciano scrambling up the hill. Gilbert and Ludwig quickly chased after him, only catching him once they reached the top.

                Down at the bottom of the slope was a group of six people and an infant child. A woman held the baby in her arms as it cried, frantically trying to quiet the child. To her right was another woman with red hair tied up in a pony tail and two men sat beside her, one was clean shaven though looking a little rough, the other had a beard and a mess of unruly curls. A young boy poked the fire they surrounded with a stick while a teenage girl with straight dark hair, accented with a purple streak, used her own stick to trace patterns in the sand.

                One glance up the hill had the red-haired woman, the two men and the teenage girl standing in defensive positions and aiming guns up at the trio.

                Feliciano frantically waved the flags he had pulled out of his bag moments earlier to the group, shouting things like “innocent!” and “don’t shoot!” in German to the group below.

                A quick glance at each other and they lowered their guns, but didn’t put them away, still clearly on the defensive.

                Moving cautiously, the three made their way down to the bottom of the hill to stand on level with the larger group.

                “Who are you?” the man with the beard demanded.

                “I’m Feliciano and this is Ludwig and Gilbert. We’re from a ways north of here and we’re heading to France to escape the war. We don’t want any trouble, really,” he said in German as calmly as possible but it was clear his voice was shaking.

                The group relaxed a little more, finally putting their guns away.

                “We’re the same,” explained the clean shaven man. “But we’re from the east and we’re headed to Belgium. Maria has some family there waiting for her so we’re making sure she gets there safe.”

                He motioned back to the girl with the purple streak in her hair.

                “Do you mind if we join you?” Feli asked.

                There was a silent discussion as the clean shaven man looked for the approval of the others before nodding.

                “Sure.”

                Feliciano, Ludwig and Gilbert joined the group around the fire, settling in easily despite the obvious tension.

                “So as I said, this is Maria, she’s a neighbor from back home, My name is Adrian, the woman over there is my wife, Adelaide with our son, Christian. This here is my brother, Gregor and the woman next to him is our sister, Iris. Lastly, that little boy there is Josef, Gregor’s son,” the clean shaven man, Adrian, explained.

                Everyone said a quiet hello as Adelaide finally got the child to quiet down a little.

                “It’s nice to meet you all,” Gilbert said.

                The next hour was filled with conversation and it was soon decided that the two groups would travel together.

                “We used to have a car,” Gregor explained. “But ran out of gas a while back and that stuff can be hard to find with all these riots. So we’ve been on foot ever since and I’ll warn you, it’s pretty slow going with the kids.”

                Gilbert nodded. “We understand. Regardless, it’s better to have a larger group,” he said.

                As Gilbert and Gergor discussed plans, Ludwig watched Feliciano approach Adelaide and talk softly to the baby in her arms. Moments later he was holding the child himself smiling and giggling with him as he bounced and walked around with the child, making the child smile and laugh. It didn’t surprise Ludwig in the least that Feliciano was good with children.

                As darkness settled in completely, Feliciano handed the child back and took the first watch with Maria as everyone else settled down to get some rest.

                “So, why is your family in Belgium?” Feliciano asked in hushed German once everyone had settled down.

                “My mom’s originally from there,” Maria replied, “My dad’s German though. They’re over there visiting my mom’s family right now, but I decided to stay behind for school.”

                Feliciano frowned at how similar her situation almost seemed to his own.

                An explosion sounded in the distance but it was quiet, indicating that it was a great distance off, but that didn’t stop Feliciano from tensing up, clinging tighter to his flags and scooting a little closer in Ludwig’s direction who only slept a few feet away.

                Maria watched and tipped her head lightly, black and purple hair cascading over her shoulder and into her lap as she pulled her knees to her chest.

                “What’s your relationship with him anyways?” she asked, nodding her chin in Ludwig’s direction.

                Feliciano seemed unsure of how to answer the question. “He’s a friend, well I think he is, I think of him as one at least, I’m not sure what he thinks of me though. We haven’t really known each other for very long,” he said, stumbling over his words, but as he went on, his words got lighter and easier to produce. “He can’t talk you know. He got really sick as a little kid and it took away his voice. But despite that, he’s really brave and strong, even if he is a little intimidating, he doesn’t seem to care if I talk too much or if I cling to him when I’m scared. I feel really safe around him.”

                Maria smiled softly. “You really like him then.”

                Feliciano smiled. “Yeah, I really do.”

                The sat in silence for a while, sitting side by side, just looking up at the stars before Maria broke the peace.

                “Are you scared Feliciano?” she asked.

                Feliciano didn’t hesitate in his answer. “Yes. I’m very scared. But I feel safe with Gilbert and Ludwig, I know they can and will protect me when I need it.”

                “You really trust them don’t you? But you said you haven’t known them for long?”

                He shook his head. “Only for a couple of weeks, really I only ran into Ludwig twice before we were forced to escape the city and I’ve been with them ever since.”

                “Then how can you trust them so easily?” she asked.

                “The same way I trust you right now even though we just met. It’s just something you know sometimes, something in your chest and in your gut,” he answered.

                She hummed lightly in response. “I think I know what you mean. I think I might trust you to Feliciano.”

                He smiled. “Good, because I’m not a bad person.”

                Maria chuckled lightly and after a moment of silence she spoke again.

                “You know Feliciano, what you said earlier about being scared. Not many people would be so open about it. Most keep it hidden. I know all of us do. That’s how we survive.”

                Feliciano hummed lightly, thinking deeply about her comment.

                “I think it’s okay to be scared, so long as you don’t let it control you, you have to use it to your advantage. The first step to bravery is admitting that you’re scared. That’s what my grandpa used to tell me. Too often the fear becomes everything and then you’re really lost.”

                “That makes sense,” she said softly. “Hey Feliciano?”    

                “Yeah?”

                “Do you think we could be friends?” she asked. “And maybe after all of this is over we could like, keep in touch or something.”

                Feliciano smiled. “I would like that a lot,” he answered.

~~~

                The next few days passed in a similar manner as before. They were up with the sun, made camp by dark and took turns on watch during the night. Progress was slower with the children, but Feliciano enjoyed playing with Josef and the baby and talking with Maria. He was much happier with more people to talk to.

                They were careful to avoid the fighting and riots, occasionally hitting towns for supplies.

                As the time passed, Feli stuck close to Ludwig and slowly began to learn how to read him better. He still couldn’t understand the sign language that he spoke to his brother with, but often times he could get an idea of what Ludwig was saying by facial expressions, mannerisms or even the way he stood.

                As they sat down to talk one night after dinner, Ludwig pulls out his note book as he normally did and frowned when he realized that there weren’t many pages left.

                “Why don’t you teach me sign language? Like how you talk to Gilbert,” Feliciano said.

                Ludwig looked uncertain but then turned so that he was facing the younger man. Slowly, one sign at a time he began to teach the Italian. Feliciano turned out to be a rather fast learner and by the time first watch started he was learning whole phrases.

                “This is fun! Now I’ll be able to talk to you like Gilbert can!” Feli said happily, settling down to sleep.

                Ludwig couldn’t help but smile lightly and give a small nod, patting Feliciano on the shoulder as he stood to take first watch.

                Gunshots in the distance had Feliciano calling out Ludwig’s name quietly. The man paused and turned around to look at Feli with a questioning look.

                “Could you stay here and keep watch for a bit, just until I fall asleep?” he asked.

                Ludwig nodded and sat back down next to him.

                And even after Feliciano fell deep asleep, he continued to sit beside him until morning.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Chapter Nine**

The next few days passed without much incident. While planes continued to pass overhead almost daily, they had yet to see another car since the couple they saw when first joining with Adrian’s group.

                It was a dreary day, damp and clouded, with a promise of heavy rain. Feliciano wasn’t sure if he was happy about this. Normally he loved the rain, he loved the fresh feeling of it and the smell and the sunshine that almost always followed, but now it just felt like a curse on their progress, a way of reminding them that not only were they subject to the terrors of the war, but slave to the elements as well.

                Shivering, Feliciano pulled his jacket closer. Ludwig had insisted that he take it during their last stop, even though it had been a hot day at the time and Feli was glad he had done so. He gave Ludwig a small smile as the German gave him a questioning look of concern.

                “Just a little cold is all, it’s wet today isn’t it?” Feli asked with a humorless chuckle.

                Ludwig looked to the sky and nodded. “Do you want my coat?” he asked, his hands moving casually in front of him.

                Feliciano shook his head. “I’m fine. You need it too don’t you?”

                Ludwig simply shrugged.

                “Aren’t you cold?”

                The blonde shook his head.

                “Guess you’re used to this kind of weather huh? It’s a little warmer in Italy, especially in the winter.”

                A gun shot echoing down the road cut off Ludwig’s response, causing his hands to freeze in mid-air. The group stopped walking, looking around for the source of the sound. An explosion had everyone tense.

                “They’re getting closer,” Feliciano said softly with worry. The sounds had become common place recently, but over the past few hours, they had grown louder the further they walked down the highway.

                Nobody said anything for a moment as they waited for more. When nothing came, Gregor shook his head. “It’s just the way this place echoes, makes everything sound closer than it really is,” he said with so much certainty that Feliciano was willing to believe him.

                They began walking again, quieter than normal this time, listening for any signs of war and attack.

                Within the hour they found themselves staring into an open field.

                Feliciano let out a soft cry and Ludwig immediately had an arm around his shoulders before he could collapse to the ground. While dead bodies had become as common place as the planes that often flew overhead or the guns that fired in the distance, they had yet to see anything like this.

                Bodies littered the field, people of every age, every gender, stained the once lush grass a permanent brownish red color. Everything was absolutely still and silent save for the flocks of birds that picked at the bodies. Most scenes like this had been found in the towns they usually tried to avoid unless they were in need of supplies. This was the first evidence of the war that was happening beyond the separate riots in the cities that seemed to have no connection. Every body scattered across the clearing was a cruel and harsh reminder with what they were truly running from.

                “To think it’s reached this far already,” Gregor muttered grimly.

                Nobody replied, staring at the wreckage the war had caused, somehow unable to move on.

                Only when the explosions and gun shots started sounding again did they look away. This time they could hear yelling.

                “We should go,” Iris said, taking a step back from the clearing.

                Everyone nodded in agreement.

                They only made it a few steps before it was clear they would not be able to take the road if they were to avoid confrontation.

                Men and woman alike ran at them from both sides, guns firing, forcing the group into the field of body’s. Breaking into a run, they made for the trees, screaming at each other to hurry over the sounds of endless gunfire.           

                There was a ringing in Feliciano’s ears, the gun shots and the screaming, the angry yelling and the baby’s cry all mixed until they were a huge swirl of sound that was nothing. All he could hear was his own beating heart, his own labored breath. All he could feel was his feet pounding against the wet ground and Ludwig’s hand gripping his tightly and leading him quickly through the maze of bodies. Never before in his life had he ever been so terrified.

                Ludwig froze, pulling Feliciano to a stop and forcing him to jolt back into firm reality and turn around to see why they had stopped.

                Behind them Adrian and Gregor were helping Iris back to her feet. Her pants were already turning dark with blood from the bullet wound in her thigh.

                “Go, GO!” Gergor shouted, waving them on. “We’ve got her!”

                Ludwig hesitated a moment, but nodded and tugged Feliciano into a run once more.

                When Adelaide tripped over a body, Ludwig dropped Feliciano’s hand, leaving him feeling empty and unprotected, and motioned for the Italian to make for the trees.

                Feliciano nodded and continued to run as Ludwig helped Adelaide up with her child and got her to the trees where Gilbert, Maria and Josef were already waiting.

                Moments later Gregor, Iris and Adrian joined them.

                “Are we all okay?” Gilbert asked.

                “Other than my leg, I think we’re all fine,” Iris said as the men lowered her to the ground next to a tree.

                They all agreed but Ludwig’s hands moved sharply as he looked around the group.

                “Where’s Feli?”

                Gilbert’s eyes went wide as he looked around the group and realized that in fact, the Italian was not with them.                 “Feli?” he called. No answer.

                “He was just with me,” Ludwig signed frantically to his brother. “I had his hand but then I let go to help Adelaide and the baby and told him to run to the trees. What if he was shot Gil? I shouldn’t have let go!”

                Gilbert grabbed his brother’s hands and looked his brother in the eyes. “Calm down Lud, he’s fine. You and I have both learned over the past couple of weeks that Feli is amazingly good at getting away, especially when he’s scared. He’s fine. He’s not stupid enough to get shot anyways.”

                Ludwig took no comfort in his brother’s words.

                “When this battle calms down and moves on we’ll go out and look for him alright?” Gilbert said.

                Ludwig nodded.

                It was nearly an hour later before the sounds of battle dissipated and Gilbert was barely on his feet by the time Ludwig was already out in the field, searching.

                Ludwig wished he had the ability to call out Feliciano’s name, but Gilbert’s voice would have to do for the both of them. As he searched the bodies, some from the most recent battle, the rest from older conflicts, he dreaded what he would find. The fear that clenched his chest and made it hard to breathe was different than what he had felt earlier running through a field of gunfire, struggling to keep his life, but it was still just as strong if not worse.

                They searched until it was too dark to see what was in front of them and they were forced to return to the group.

                There was no camp fire that night, and very little conversation. They tried to eat but no one was really hungry.

                Ludwig agreed to take first watch. There was no way he was going to be able to sleep anyways.

               Gilbert gave him a look that even though it was dark and nearly impossible to see, Ludwig knew exactly what it was. A look of pity and forced hope that Ludwig was glad he couldn’t see.

                Gilbert patted his brother on the shoulder then headed to bed.

                Maria joined Ludwig a few moments later.

                “We’ll find him, Feli is much braver than he seems,” she said softly.

                Ludwig didn’t respond, but then again she didn’t expect one, even if he had been able to speak.

~~~

                Feliciano’s body was sore from shaking, the tree was rough against his sore back as he sat against it, backpack hugged to his chest, flags gripped so tightly in his fists that his fingers had started to go numb.

                The sounds of battle continued on behind him. After leaving Ludwig, he had run for the trees and hid behind one of the larger ones. Too scared to move, he stayed there, hoping that someone would find him.

                Feliciano didn’t know how long he was sitting there, waiting, before he finally heard footsteps crunching against the leaves and branches. His breath caught and through the sounds of battle he listened as the steps grew steadily closer.               

                Moments later he was looking up the barrel of a gun and into the stern face of a German soldier.

                Feli gasped, looking up at the man in fear. The man glanced at the flags gripped tightly in the Italian’s hands and slowly lowered his gun. In one abrupt movement he launched out an arm and roughly tugged Feliciano to his feet.

                Feliciano let out a cry expecting the worse. “Please! Please just let me go! I didn’t mean anything!” he begged in German.

               The last thing he expected was for the man to actually oblige to his wishes by releasing him before speaking harshly.

                “Go, get out of here Italian. This is not your place. Get as far away as you can and don’t look back. Run far and run fast.”

                Feliciano nodded frantically. “Yes sir!” he said. He did not need any more prompting as he took off into the trees.

                He ran as fast as he could. He didn’t know how long, how far or in what direction he ran. He just knew he had to get away, get someplace safe. He would find a safe little place to hide, far, far away from the battle and Ludwig would find him. Ludwig always found him when he was lost, always showed up when he needed him most.

                The forest grew steadily darker and after tripping several times, he always pushed himself back up, but this time, his toe caught on a root and sent him tumbling in the a ravine. Figuring this was as good a place as any to hide until morning, he didn’t bother to get up. Instead, he moved into a more comfortable position and as he waited for sleep, he found himself wishing that Ludwig was there to keep him safe.

                As his eyes finally drifted closed he could have sworn he heard his name in the distance.


	10. Chapter Ten

 

**Chapter Ten**

“You’ll have to move on without us.”

                This news did not come as a shock to Adrian or anyone else in the group but Maria looked to Gilbert with mild disdain.

                “I want to stay and help look for Feli!” she said.

                Adrian frowned as Gregor stepped forward to place a hand on her shoulder.

                “We have to get you to your family Maria,” he said gently.

                “Whatever! A couple days isn’t going to make a difference as long as I get there alive. Feli is my friend and I want to help looking for him!” she cried, shoving Gregor’s hand away.

                “Maria… sweetheart…” Iris tried but Maria wouldn’t hear it.

                “I’ve proven that I can take care of myself over and over again since we left. Why can’t I stay and help? It’s not like I’m by myself, I’ll have Ludwig and Gilbert with me.”

                “And how will you get to Belgium, Maria? They’re going in a completely different direction,” Adelaide stated.

                “But…”

                Gilbert stepped up and placed a gentle hand on Maria’s shoulder, causing her to look at him.

                “The most important thing right now, Maria, is for you to reach Belgium safely and get back to your family,” he said gently. “Ludwig and I will find Feliciano, it’ll be alright. It’s dangerous to stay back with us and the last thing Feli would want is for you to risk your well-being looking for him.”

                This seemed to hit something with the girl and she nodded. “Alright Gil. My full name is Maria Kraemer. You remember that and let me know he’s okay as soon as you can,” she said firmly.

                “Of course,” he said with a grin. “Someone as awesome as me will definitely find him in one piece and let you know.”

                A small smile played at her lips but it was a little sad. Suddenly she wrapped Gilbert in a tight hug. “Be safe.”

                “You too Maria,” he said softly, returning the embrace.

                After giving a quick hug to Ludwig as well, the men shook hands, they said a few parting words and Adrian’s party disappeared into the trees.

                No sooner had they vanished from sight did Ludwig disappear as well to search for Feliciano. While separating would have covered more ground, the brothers decided to stick together to reduce the chance of losing each other.

                The rest of the day was spent scouring the area and endlessly calling Feliciano’s name. By the time it grew dark they had found not even a hint of what direction he had gone.

                There was a tense silence when they settled down for the night as Gilbert struggled on deciding what was the best way of approaching the subject that was on his mind.

                “Ludwig, I think it might be best if we move on tomorrow,” he said carefully.     

                The look on his brother’s face could have killed and was enough to force Gilbert back a step.

                “No! We stay and search some more!” Ludwig signed angrily.

                Gilbert easily realized that there was no arguing on this matter. Even if he decided to move on, it was very likely that Ludwig would just stay behind without him and the last thing he wanted was for them to get separated as well.

                Sighing, he said, “fine, but after tomorrow we move on. There’s a chance he isn’t even here. He could have moved on with us in hopes of meeting up with us somewhere.”

                Ludwig was not happy about this but could not argue the logic and thus agreed.

                As he settled down to sleep a few minutes later, he found that it was difficult to close his eyes and ended up rolling onto his back focusing on the night sounds that surrounded him. Wind shaking the branches of the trees, the subtle sound of bugs, the occasional gun fire in the distance, some call of a bird or wild animal. Peering up at what stars he could see through the canopy above him. After a while he let the peacefulness of the forest push him into sleep.

~~~

                _The place Ludwig was in was oddly familiar, but he could have sworn that he had never been there before. Green grass cushioned his steps as turned in a circle. Off in the distance there was a small village, the other direction a forest that trailed into snow topped mountains. He seemed to be standing in a valley of sorts, a layer of bright green stretching on for miles. He wasn’t sure how he got there but he couldn’t really argue with the warmth and peacefulness of it._

_After a moment of enjoying the scenery, he decided to head in the direction of the village but only made it a few steps when a familiar voice called his name. Pausing, he slowly turned around and his heart flew at the sight of a red haired Italian boy beaming a bright smile at him._

_“Ludwig, where are you going?” he asked, laughter in his voice._

_Ludwig didn’t have an answer, where was he going?_

_“You were supposed to come find me,” Feliciano asked._

_Ludwig frowned, what did he mean?_

_“You were supposed to keep me safe. You always found me when I needed you the most. Where are you now? Where are you Ludwig?”_

_Feliciano’s smile was gone and he looked at Ludwig with such a betrayed and heartbroken look that Ludwig found he had no excuses._

_“I trusted you.”_

_Red started to spread through Feliciano’s shirt, starting from his heart and spreading out and down. Ludwig’s eyes widened as he rushed forward, unable to reach the Italian before he fell to the ground._

_Ludwig fell to his knees beside the younger man but was unable to grab him, his arms passing straight through. He tried to call out but of course no sound came and he watched with pained horror as Feliciano’s eyes closed and his chest slowly stilled. Coughing, he soon realized that they were surrounded by smoke but there was no fire to speak of._

                Ludwig woke gagging and coughing and gasping for air.

                Gilbert was by his side in a minute. “Hey Ludwig, you okay?” he asked.

                Ludwig nodded, the moon light enough for Gilbert to see the motion. He started to sign to his brother but Gilbert told him to hold a moment before digging a flash light out of his bag and pointing the beam at his brother. Ludwig flinched slightly at the light and let his eyes focused before repeating what he had started to say before.

                “I can’t sleep, so why don’t you get some rest and take the first watch?”

                Gilbert frowned but nodded. “Alright.”

                They switched places and Ludwig dug around in his bag for a bit before finding what he was looking for at the bottom beneath a couple rolls of bandages and a bottle of water.

                Pulling the white flag from the confines of his bag, he unrolled it and fingered the fabric. Feliciano had made it for him as a sort of gift when they had first started this journey, but Ludwig had put it in his bag and forgotten about it, never really having a use for it as Feli seemed to, but now, he was glad he had it. It was a connection of sorts to his lost friend, an unspoken promise that everything was alright, a symbol not of surrender, but of hope that, somewhere, a young man from Italy was hiding, alone and scared, clinging to his own white flag, believing that Ludwig would come and rescue him. It was a symbol of the hope that he was right.

~~~

                When still they couldn’t find Feliciano the next day, Gilbert stated that they had to move on.

                Once again Ludwig refused.

                “No. He could be bleeding out somewhere. Shot and dying, lost and afraid. I’m not just going to leave him!”

                Gilbert was quickly growing tired of Ludwig’s stubbornness. “We’ve searched everywhere Ludwig,” he snapped. “I already said yesterday that the odds are that he’s moved on and the more we search and the more we don’t find him, the more likely that option is becoming. And I swear to God Ludwig if you don’t come with me, I will knock you out and carry you out of here myself.”

                Ludwig growled, knowing very well that Gilbert would do absolutely that and even though he was taller and stronger, Gilbert would end up winning in the end if Ludwig fought back.

                “Fine,” he signed sharply.

                Gilbert nodded and they headed through the trees back onto the main road and walked for hours in angry silence.

                By the time they set up camp that night, the anger had dissipated and after staring into the fire for several minutes, each lost in their own thoughts, Gilbert decided to speak.

                “What are your feelings with Feli anyways?” He didn’t look at his brother as he asked the question, keeping his focus on the fire that flickered at his feet, but he could still sense his brother’s shock at the inquiry.

                It was a long moment before Ludwig shrugged and Gilbert finally turned to watch his hands.

                “I don’t know. I know he is very special to me. I want… I need to protect him. He’s a bright light in a world of shadows and someone like that doesn’t deserve to be in a place as black as this. I want to get him somewhere safe, where I can see him smile all the time.”

                Gilbert smiled and picked up the stick he had beside him and poked at the fire. “So you love him.”

                Ludwig sputtered slightly at the accusation as Gilbert dropped the stick again.

                “I…. I don’t know,” he signed, his answer resigned as he found he couldn’t outright deny it. “Besides, now is hardly the time for such things.”

                Gilbert shook his head. “On the contrary, this might be the best time. You have to take it while you have it Lud. You never know when it’ll be lost. If you wait for all of this to be over, it might be too late.”

                “You’re being disturbingly wise,” Ludwig replied, causing Gilbert to chuckle. “Besides, I refuse to discuss such morbid things at a time like this.”

                “Fine, fine, well you should get some rest, I’ll take first watch tonight,” Gilbert said standing and kicking dirt on the fire to get the bigger flames before stomping the rest of it out.

                Ludwig nodded and soon he was on his back, once again staring at the sky.

                “Good night Lud, I love you,” Gilbert said, settling down for the watch, letting them fall into silence as they waited for morning to dawn again.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Chapter Eleven**

                If Feliciano had to say he was anything, he would easily state, without hesitation, that he was exhausted. His feet hurt, blisters had developed on his heels, he was covered in scrapes and scratches from his escape through the forest, and his hair was tangled with sap and twigs. The storm had passed over without letting down anything more than a drizzle and so the sun was now shining brightly as Feli made his way down the road. His bag was much lighter now, but while it did provide some relief on one hand, it also meant that he was very low on supplies, leaving a bad taste in his mouth from dehydration and his stomach begging painfully for food. It had been about four days since his separation from Gilbert and Ludwig and while only two of those had been without food and one without water, it was enough to leave him in misery. Not to mention his wrist throbbed with pain and he was fairly certain it was sprained from when he fell in the ravine since he couldn’t even try to move it without gasping in pain.

                Somehow, despite the fact that he had initially been running away from it, Feliciano had found his way back to the main road. It was lonely and painfully quiet, but he looked ahead with every step, hoping, expecting, to see Gilbert and Ludwig around every corner. He refused to let that hope dwindle with every disappointing turn and trudged on towards what he hoped was the right direction.

                As always, he made sure to hide from cars and planes and avoid all semblance of conflict. He came across two more body filled clearings in his travels and always he turned a blind eye and walked past as quickly as possible. Not out of disrespect, but as a way of keeping his own sanity.

                It was strange, on his own like he was, he was forced to be strong and rely on himself for comfort and protection, but often found himself faltering. He had to wonder how he ever did this before Ludwig. He was tired of running, of searching and finding only nothing, of being alone. He wanted to watch Ludwig teach him how to speak with his hands, he wanted that strong and comforting presence when he couldn’t sleep at night and that strong hand in his every time they searched a town and bodies lay crumpled in the streets. While Feliciano could definitely hold his own when it came down to it, he was simply tired of doing so.

                Twice since the separation had he been spotted by those fighting in this meaningless war, twice he had been able to escape but lost in his thoughts now he was only alerted to the German voices speaking not far off until it was too late.

                Taking notice of his surroundings, he noticed a group of five or so men standing a little ways down the road holding guns.

                He tried to back away slowly but still they noticed him and immediately took aim. Calling out, they refused to lower their guns when Feliciano showed them his flags and so he turn and ran.

                A gun shot rang out loud into the air and Feli only realized he was shot once he stumbled and a sharp burning sensation started in his side. Pushing himself back up, he placed a hand over the wound and kept running, making for the cover of the trees.

                He ran until his own footsteps where the only ones he could hear and collapsed to the ground. Dropping his pack in front of him, he struggled to catch his breath as he dug out the bandages and pulled off his shirt to inspect the damage. He was a slight bit relieved to find that it was only a graze, but regardless the wound was still pretty nasty.

                Regretting not having any water to clean the wound, he bound it up the best he could before pulling his shirt and back pack back on and heading back for the main road.

                He kept to the trees for a while, with the road in sight before he felt that he was far enough from where the men had spotted him to return to the easier terrain.

                Keeping his eyes forward a profound sense of relief flooded through him as he spotted a city not far down the road.    

                Within the hour he was walking down the streets. Not as abandoned as he was used to, with stores still open and no dead bodies in the street. In fact, there were people walking down the sidewalks. They mostly ignored Feliciano, but a few sent him glances of either disgust or pity. Everyone avoided him.

                Feeling dizzy and exhausted and on the verge of collapse, he entered a small store and grabbed a bottle of water. Pulling his wallet out of his pocket, glad that he had kept it with him, he paid for the water before downing the bottle in a matter of seconds.

                “Hey son, are you alright?” the man asked from behind the counter.

                Feliciano shook his head, “Is there a hospital around here?” he asked with a weak and hoarse voice.

                The man shook his head. “There is but I’m afraid it’s full with this war. They’re already over their limit, I’m sorry.”

                “It’s okay, I should survive,” he said. “Though I do have another question. Has a tall blond man that doesn’t say anything and a shorter man with a loud voice, white hair and red eyes come through here in the last few days?”

                “No, not that I’ve seen,” the cashier said, shaking his head once more. “I haven’t seen anyone like that.”

                Feliciano nodded, trying his best not to be disappointed by the news. He left the counter and wandered the shop, grabbing a few more bottles of water and some food before returning.

                “Why are you still here?” he asked, setting the items down to be scanned.

                “No reason to run, most people have evacuated because of the war, but I have no place to go. Even if I did leave, when this war finally ends, those damn rioters would have trashed this place more than likely so I would have nothing to come back to either. So I figured my best option was just to hang around for as long as I could and hope for the best.”

                Feliciano nodded, understanding the answer.

                “Hey, do you think you could pass on a message for me?” he asked.

                The cashier nodded. “What is it?”

                “Those two men I described earlier. Their names are Gilbert and Ludwig.” He paused a moment as the man retrieved some paper to write the information down before continuing. “If they happen to come around could you tell them that Feli is safe and alright and if they follow the main road they should find him?”

                He jotted down the information before nodding. “Can do. I really doubt that I’ll meet this Gilbert and Ludwig, but if I do, I’ll pass the information on.”

                Feliciano smiled, paying for the items and putting them in his bag.

                “Thank you,” he said with as much gratitude as he could muster.

                “Not a problem, anything I can do help in this war, especially for those just trying to escape,” he said.

                Shrugging his bag back onto his shoulders, Feli nodded. “Good bye,” he said before returning once more to his journey.


	12. Chapter Twelve

 

**Chapter Twelve**

It was less than 24 hours later when Gilbert and Ludwig entered the town Feliciano had been in just the day before. They found it a small relief to not find it dead and abandoned, though most of the people kept to themselves and a vast majority of the shops were closed or abandoned. As they wandered the streets, they kept an eye out for an auburn haired Italian.

                “There,” Gilbert said suddenly, startling Ludwig. He followed Gilbert’s finger to where it pointed. A small store sat on the corner of the street, one of the only places left open in the city.

                Ludwig immediately headed over with Gilbert right behind him.

                As they entered, the eyes of the man behind the counter went wide, looking unbelieving as Gilbert approached the counter.

                “Have you seen—“ he started but the shop keeper cut him off.

                “A friendly red haired man with a funny curl and an accent?”

                Gilbert and Ludwig blinked and Ludwig pushed past his brother and signed to the man to tell him more.

                The shop keeper turned to Gilbert for translation.

                “When did you see him, do you know where he is now?”

                “I just saw him yesterday,” the man answered. “He came in here and bought water and food. Looked a little worse for wear. Asked about a hospital, but when I told him it was beyond full he said he would be fine and that I met a Ludwig and Gilbert that looked like yourselves to tell them that he….” He trailed off for a moment, looking around in a drawer for the paper he had wrote the information down on yesterday. “ah, here it is. That he is safe and alright and that if you follow the main road you should be able to find him.”

                Ludwig gave the man sharp thank you before tugging on Gilbert’s arm and heading for the door.

                “Hold up Lud, we know he’s safe, let’s get some supplies before heading out,” Gilbert said.

                “He asked about a hospital, he’s obviously hurt,” Ludwig snapped.

                “But he walked away, I’m sure he’ll be okay for the few minute sit takes for us to get food and water,” he said.

                Ludwig growled but helped Gilbert pick up the items before they once again whole heartedly thanked the shop keeper and left the store.

                As they left the town, their pace was far quicker than normal and Ludwig’s long determined strides kept him a steady distance ahead of his brother.

                Despite making good progress, Ludwig was growing frustrated with the lack of any sign of their friend.

                “If he expected us to meet up with him, we should have caught up with him by now,” he said, his hand moving sharp and quick.

                “Calm down Lud, there’s a town not far from here, there’s a chance we might find him there,” Gilbert replied.

                Ludwig was willing to believe it as they started walking again, but as they reached the town Gilbert had mentioned, they only found their hopes sinking lower.

                By the time they hit city limits, they could hear screams and shouts, gun fires and sirens. Entering the shadows of tall buildings and rounding the corner had them face to face with a riot in progress with people attacking each other in the streets, fires burning and no one taking notice of Ludwig or Gilbert.

                “C’mon, we better get out of here,” Gilbert said quietly, tugging on Ludwig’s elbow as he took a step back and turned to head in the other direction.

                But Ludwig had other ideas, pulling his arm from Gilbert’s grasp, he ran straight into the riot.

                “Ludwig!” he shouted, chasing after his brother. “What the hell, are you _crazy?!_ ”

                Ludwig didn’t stop as he turned slightly, just long enough to show one sign to Gilbert.

                _Feliciano._

Gilbert faltered slightly. “You _are_ crazy!” he called, finally catching up with his brother. “There is no way he’s in there! We both know he’s smarter than that.”

                He was eating his words as soon as he caught sight of Feliciano being pushed into a brick wall by a man considerably taller than him.

                Ludwig was on the man in seconds, getting a few punches in and knocking the man out before turning his attention to Feliciano.

                “Feli?!” Gilbert called, helping the younger man back to his feet.

                “Gilbert?!” The absolute relief and joy in the Italian’s voice was tangible. “Is Ludwig there too? Someone sprayed something in my eyes and now they burn really bad.” The joy was broken away to the pain he was obviously feeling.

                Ludwig reached down and took Feli’s hand and watched his face light up only briefly before twisting back into pain again.

                “Luddy! You are here!”

               “Of course he’s here, now let’s go take care of your eyes, quickly now,” Gilbert said, helping him around the corner, away from the riot and into the nearest store, and back into the bathroom. “how long ago did you get sprayed?” he asked.

                “Only a few seconds before that man pushed me into the wall, I don’t know what it was though.” His voice was almost a whine now and tears flowed freely down his cheeks.

                “C’mon, we’ll wash them out the best we can.”

                Gilbert and Ludwig led Feliciano to a sink that Gilbert was very relieved to find still had running water. “Ludwig, see if you can find a cup or something to help pour this over his eyes.”

                Ludwig nodded and disappeared from the room, returning a few minutes later with a coffee mug to find Gilbert using his hand to dump water over Feliciano’s eyes as he bent over the sink. Gilbert took the cup from his brother and quickly rinsed it a few times before using it to transport the water to Feli’s eyes.

                After several minutes of this, Gilbert decided that they had done all they could and turned the water off and sunk to the floor.

                “Might was well stick here for the night,” he said.

                Ludwig helped Feliciano down to the floor next to Gilbert before sitting down next to him.

                “I-I still can’t see Gil,” Feli said, a tremor of fear in his voice.

                “You’re alright Feli, it’s probably just something that takes time to come back. You’ll be better by tomorrow.”

                Feli frowned but nodded. “Alright.” He had no choice but to believe him.

                Ludwig finally took the chance to inspect the Italian and wasn’t happy with what he saw. A thick blood stain on his left side and his swollen and discolored wrist were the causes of greatest concern.         

                Making sure to be gentle as not to startle the man, he placed a hand on Feliciano’s shoulder first to let him know that he was there before moving his hand down to lift his shirt to look at the wound on his side.

                A small gasp escaped Feli as he remained still, flinching and whining as Ludwig prodded the bandage lightly before gently removing it, causing the younger man to hiss.

                Ludwig frowned and motioned for Gilbert to take a look.

                “Fuck… Feli, what happened?” he asked.

                “I ran into some soldiers, they thought I was the enemy even though I had my flags. I don’t think they cared. But I ran away and they shot me and one of them hit. Sort of,” he explained.

                Ludwig pursed his lips and set to work, cleaning the wound and applying a fresh bandage.

                “That’s going to be a nasty scar, but it’ll heal,” Gilbert said. “What about your wrist? That’s not much better is it?”

                “I think I sprained it when I fell into a ravine right after we got separated. I tried to keep it wrapped but they kept falling off.”

                Nobody said a word as Ludwig took bandages from his bag and wound it around the injured joint, firmly but gently.

                “I have another question,” Gilbert said. “What were you doing in the middle of a riot anyways?” he asked, trying to keep the ‘are you really that stupid’ tone out of his voice.

                “I didn’t mean to,” Feli answered, sounding dangerously close to a child getting caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to. “I was just trying to make it through the city when this big mob of people came down the street and I got caught up in it even though I ran and every time I tried to escape, somebody would grab me or push me and I couldn’t get away.”

                Ludwig rested a hand on his head in a silent display of comfort. He took his position back up next to Feliciano and running his hands through the Italian’s hair, pulled free the twigs and leaves and other debris he had stuck in there.

                With such a soothing touch, it was only moments before Feliciano was asleep against Ludwig’s shoulder.

                Shifting slightly to his hip, he pulled his jacket from where it was tied at his hips and draped it over Feliciano as a makeshift blanket before getting his arm into a more comfortable position as Feli nuzzled closer into his shoulder.

                Moments later he was asleep as well, sitting up against the cool tile wall with his arm wrapped protectively around Feliciano.

~~~

                When Ludwig awoke the next morning, it was hard to tell how late it was with no windows. Feliciano continued to sleep soundly against his shoulder, and appeared not to have moved at all over the night. Ludwig reached up and brushed away a clump of dirt that was stuck to his cheek and quickly found that he didn’t mind in the least that the arm he had wrapped around the sleeping Italian was cramped and numb.

                The touch to his cheek had Feliciano’s eyes opening and the expression that gazed up at Ludwig was a strange mix of happiness and confused disdain.

                “Everything’s all blurry,” he mumbled, slowly pushing himself up, causing Ludwig’s coat to slip off his shoulders and to his lap. He rubbed his eyes in an attempt to clear them before investigating the coat that had been keeping him warm.

                “Is this yours Luddy?” he asked. Ludwig nodded, taking back the offered coat.

                “Oh good, you two are awake,” Gilbert said as he entered the room from where ever it was that he had been, his voice echoing in the small room. “We should get going. How are your eyes Feli?”

                “Better,” Feliciano answered. “But they’re still really blurry.”

                “Good. Here’s something for breakfast, Ludwig says he’ll carry you on his back until your eyes are better. It’ll be faster than you tripping over everything.”

                Feliciano took the chocolate that was pressed into his hands and nodded. “Alright. But are you sure you can carry me Luddy?” he asked.

                Gilbert chuckled at the look Ludwig gave him. “He’s sure.”

                After a quick breakfast they left the building and soon they were free of the town and back on the main road.

                Feliciano rested his chin against Ludwig’s shoulder as they walked and after several hours, he finally expressed the worry that had been plaguing his thoughts since the night before.

                “I’m scared Luddy,” he said softly.

                Ludwig’s arms tightened ever so slightly around his legs.

                “What if I never get my sight back? We won’t be able to talk anymore.”

                When the stopped suddenly, Feliciano lifted his head in shocked confusion, the feeling only growing as Ludwig lowered him to the ground. “What’s going on? Why are we stopping? Are you tired of carrying me because I don’t mind walking.”

                “I think Lud wants to talk to you,” said Gilbert with a slightly confused expression.

                “Oh, what is it Luddy?” he asked.

                There was a brief moment of silence as Ludwig signed out what he wanted to say.

                “He says ‘You will get better, don’t think for one moment that you won’t.’”

                “But—“

                “’Even if you don’t, I’m not going to abandon you just because of that. It will take much much more than that to get rid of me. I will always be your friend Feliciano.’”

                Feliciano’s chest swelled slightly and he reached out in the direction of the blur he could almost make out as a person.

                Ludwig met him half way and second’s later Feliciano had him wrapped in a tight hug. “Thank you Luddy,” he whispered.

                Minutes later he was back on Ludwig’s back and they were walking again until dark.

                “Well, we didn’t make it as far, but I’m certain that this is farther than we would have made it if you were walking Feli,” Gilbert said as they settled down to sleep.

                “Do you think my eyes will be better tomorrow?” he asked.

                Gilbert shrugged. “Probably.”

                Feli was comforted by this and quickly fell asleep.

~~~

                The next morning Feliciano was over joyed to see clearly again once he opened his eyes, but he could help but feel off. Closing one eye at a time, his joy quickly plummeted as he realized that only his right eye has healed and his left eye had gone almost completely black.

                “Luddy, Luddy! Wake up,” Feliciano said, shaking the German as Gilbert came over from his look out position to see what was wrong.

                “What is it Feli?” Gil asked.

                “Only my right eye healed, I can’t see out of my left,” he said, his voice an odd mix of happy and disdain.

                Ludwig sat up running a hand through his hair. “How clear is your right eye?” he asked, with his hands as Gilbert translated.

                “I can see you signing and I can see everything else just fine, it just looks a little funny, I can’t see things to my left,” he answered.

                Ludwig nodded, stretching.

                “There’s not much we can do about that Feli, let’s just be grateful you can see as well as you can. It could have been worse,” Gilbert said, pulling food from the bags for breakfast. He frowned at Feli, obviously not happy with the circumstances, despite his words.

                “Yeah I know,” he said softly, rubbing his left eye as if that would make it better. Suddenly he looked up, eyes bright. “Luddy, can you make me an eye patch?” he asked.

                Ludwig gave him a look that clearly said. ‘Do you really need one?”

                “Yeah!” said Feliciano excitedly. “Then I can be like the pirates in the story books Lovino used to read to me as a kid and it will make me look really cool and people will think I’m tough and stuff!”

                Ludwig and Gilbert couldn’t help but both laugh at the idea and in the end Ludwig did as Feliciano asked and made an eye patch out of some bandages, tying it firmly to Feliciano’s head with an amused smile.

                Feliciano looked up at him once it was done, touching the bandaged that now covered his blind eye and beamed.

                Gilbert watched the interaction with a tender smile, glad they could still find some happiness out of all of this.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

 

**Chapter Thirteen**

The next few days were passed with nothing worthy of mentioning. The trio avoided trouble and stayed out of towns the best they could. Their daily travels were filled with casual conversation and talk of what they did as children and what they would do once they reached France. They could all tell that they were getting close.

                “Was France always this far?” Feliciano whined, his feet dragging as he hung off Ludwig who pushed him away, annoyed.

                “We’re almost there,” Gilbert says. “Just a few more days.”

                “Can’t we just catch a ride?” Feliciano pressed.

                “First of all, we haven’t seen a car in the past two days, second of all, you should know better than anybody that it is dangerous to trust anyone right now,” Gilbert argued.

                Feli frowned and fell silent.

                “Do you think Maria and Adrian and his family made it to Belgium?” he asked after a bit.

                “I’m sure they made it fine,” Gilbert said, his tone gentler than before.

                Feliciano smiled, happy with the thought that at least someone made it out of this okay so far.

~~~

                “Alright, I’m gonna go get wood to make a fire,” Gilbert declared as Ludwig dug out a pit for the fire.

                Gilbert gave his brother a pointed look before leaving and Ludwig pretended not to see.

                “We’re gonna make it to France, aren’t we,” Feliciano said, sitting down next to Ludwig as he finished digging the pit and put the foldable shovel back into the front pocket of his bag.

                Ludwig nodded, very aware of how close Feli was sitting to him. Normally it wasn’t a problem, Feliciano usually liked to be close, especially to Ludwig, but Gilbert’s look from earlier had him feeling nervous.

                “Hey, you should start teaching me signing again! We lost a few lessons for those days that we were separated,” said Feliciano.

                Ludwig nodded, turning to face Feli.

                They reviewed vocabulary and moved on to phrases. Feliciano struggled with a certain hand position and Ludwig reached forward and manually adjusted his fingers into the right form. He paused a moment before pulling away. He could have sworn the Feliciano was blushing.

                He went quiet for a minute before signing a question that he hoped Feliciano had learned enough to understand.

                “What am I to you?”

                Feliciano frowned. “I don’t really understand,” he said. It was clear that he meant the question itself and not the translation.

                Ludwig frowned and pulled out the notebook he still kept in his pocket. He was happy he had remembered to grab a new one at their last load up on supplies.

                He pulled out his pen and flipped to a blank page before he started writing.

                Feliciano watched the look of concentration on Ludwig’s face as he took several minutes and pages to write out everything he wanted to say. Finally, once he was finished, he handed the notebook over for Feli to read.

                _‘When you were missing I was so worried. I was really scared about what might have happened to you, about how I would find you. It was really hard for me to move on. Even as Gilbert convinced me to move on from that clearing, my thoughts and goals were no longer of getting to France and getting to safety, but of finding you. I had to make sure you were safe. I felt that because I lost you in the first place that I had betrayed you and your trust. You relied on me to protect you and I let you down. And then when you thought you wouldn’t get your sight back, the idea that I would leave you, that you would think that I wouldn’t keep you safe even after everything we went through because of one little thing… it brought up a strange feeling of fear and worry. The idea of leaving you, even after we got to France never crossed my mind and I’m slowly realizing that all I want is to see you smile and listening to you talk about anything that comes to mind like you used to. I never want to lose that. Even after all of this is over._

Feli took several moments to let the words sink in before slowly looking up at Ludwig. “I understand,” he said in a hushed tone. “I felt the same. The whole time we were apart, all I wanted was to be back by your side. I was so scared and while I could survive and take care of myself, I didn’t want to. I was alone and I missed the way you took my hand every time you pulled me from danger or the way you sat with me when I couldn’t sleep. I thought of getting to France, but the goal wasn’t refuge, it was the hopes that maybe if I got there, I would see you again.”

                Ludwig took his notebook back and after some thought wrote down a few more words.

                _‘What does this mean?’_

Feliciano smiled. “It means we answered your question. You’re someone very special to me Ludwig.”

                _‘You’re someone very special to me as well, Feliciano.’_

After a moment, he turned to a blank page and wrote something down that Feli couldn’t see before tearing it out of the notebook.

                “What did you write?” Feli asked, trying to see the paper.

                Ludwig shook his head, folding the paper before the younger man could read the words written there. He moved it out of Feliciano’s reach when the Italian tried to grab the paper and pushed him away.

                “C’mon, let me see!” Feliciano cried, reaching for the paper once more.

                Ludwig shook his head again sharply and shoved the paper into his pocket and pushed Feliciano away once more.

                “Alright you two, stop flirting and help me build this fire.”

                The two turned to Gilbert in shock, blushing lightly at the comment as Feliciano sat back, ceasing his attempts at retrieving the paper and Ludwig stood to help with the fire.

                Gilbert chuckled with a smirk, receiving a glare from Ludwig as a result.

~~~

                Gilbert took first watch that night, and they had just settled into silence when Feliciano felt Ludwig slip something under the jacket he was currently using as a pillow.

                He waited a moment before sliding his hand under and pulling out a small, folded piece of paper. Unfolding it as quietly as possible, he used what little light he had to make out three words in German.

                _‘Ich liebe dich.’_

A smile spread across Feliciano’s face and he took in a deep breath to contain his glee as a warm flooded through him. Folding the paper back up he slid it carefully into his pocket and sat up to move a little closer to Ludwig. Leaning down he whispered so only he could hear.

                “Ti amo, Ludwig.”

                There was a very small gasp that Feliciano barely caught as he laid back down. Feliciano closed his eyes but could hear Ludwig turning over  and as he drifted off to sleep he could feel Ludwig’s warm fingers slip into his own and in all his life, he had never felt safer.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Chapter Fourteen**

 

                Ludwig walked  ahead with steady strides as Feliciano hummed lightly by his side. Gilbert hung back slightly as he watched them, taking note of how their hands brushed as they walked.

                “Hey Feli!” he cried with a smile, causing the Italian to turn around and look at him.

                Ludwig kept walking as Feli stopped a moment to fall in step with Gilbert.

                “What is it?” he asked.

                “So he finally told you huh?” he asked, sounding much like a child in the school yard.

                Feliciano’s eye brows furrowed in confusion. “Told me what?”

                “How he feels about you. That you’re super special to him and all that.”

                Feliciano’s eyes widened and a blush spread across his face. “Ah, well, yes…”

                “And obviously you feel the same or you two wouldn’t be walking together all lovey dovey up there.”                  

                Feli opened his mouth to say something but Gilbert waved it off. “It’s fine, really, I’m the one that kind of pushed him into it so I’m really happy that it turned out so well for you two.

               “In case you hadn’t notices, I care an awful lot about Ludwig and in the end, his happiness is what’s most important. You obviously do that for him and while I don’t feel about you the way he obviously does, you make me really happy as well Feli, and I care about you almost as much as I do him.”

                Feli couldn’t help but smile shyly at the compliment.

                “You’ve been part of the family since Ludwig brought you home. He’s opened up to you more than almost anybody else in his life. He’s been rather introverted most of his life you know. Didn’t like to talk to people or get to know them, didn’t like annoying or hindering them because of his inability to speak. He had his heart broken one too many times because some people couldn’t handle it. Kids can be cruel sometimes, you know? Well eventually he just gave up trying and more or less cut himself off. Of course he found ways of accommodating, finished school, all of that, but it wasn’t until you came along that I ever saw him actually want to get to know somebody since he was a kid. It was really nice to see.”

                “Don’t talk about me like I can’t hear you,” Ludwig said stopping in front of them to sign the words.

                Gilbert laughed and nudged his brother playfully. “Sorry Lud,” he said unapologetically.

                Ludwig growled lightly and Feliciano smiled up at him, taking his hand as they started walking again. Ludwig still seemed annoyed but said nothing more as he wrapped his finger’s around Feliciano’s and slid his other hand into the front pocket of his jeans.

                Caught up in their playful banter, none of them noticed the car until it pulled up next to them on the road. They all cursed themselves for not paying better attention as Gilbert reached for the gun in hem of his pants.

                The vehicle was small, worn, and rusted and the driver was a middle aged woman with brown fraying hair and laugh lines around her face. She leaned over the passenger’s seat and spoke out the window.

                “Where are you three headed?” she asked.

                They all hesitated to answer. She didn’t seem malicious, but nowadays, you couldn’t tell any more who was on what side.

                She smiled and motioned to the back of the vehicle. “Why don’t you check in the back?” she asked.

                They did as she said and found camping supplies, a suitcase, bins of food and cooking utensils, gas cans and a gun. She was obviously heading someplace.

                “I wouldn’t have all of that if I was fighting in the war would I?” she called out. “Besides, it’s three of you strong men against one old lady like me, you have the advantage in this situation.”

                While Gilbert wouldn’t call her an old lady, she did have a point. While she still could have been tricking them, something told him that that wasn’t the case.

                Finally Gilbert switched the gun’s safety back on and answered the woman’s earlier question.

                “We’re headed to France.”

                “Wonderful, I’m headed that way myself, why don’t you boys climb in, it’s not good to be walking around like this. There’s a war going on, don’t you know?” She laughed lightly at her own joke and while it didn’t make the situation better, it did relieve the tension a little bit.

                Opening the door, Gilbert took the passenger’s seat while Feliciano and Ludwig took the seats in the back.

                Gilbert kept the gun in his lap, not bothering to hide it from the woman and she didn’t bother to mention it.

                “Got a few hundred Kilometers left on the tank. I’ll take you boys as far as the car will, but once the tank is empty I’m afraid that’s as far as we go.”

                They all nodded in understanding. Really, this was more than they could have asked for in the first place.

                “What sends you to France?” she asked. “Other than the war I mean. Why not Belgium or Poland?”

                “I have a friend there that agreed to let us take refuge with him until the war was over.”

                She nodded. “My son is studying in France, I’m going to stay with him for a while. I’m glad he’s not here. He would probably be fighting if he was. Very loyal to his country you know. And he always thinks that he has to take on all problems as his own. Sweet boy but sometimes I don’t understand what’s going on inside that crazy head of his.”

                There was light conversation and idle chit chat, but mostly the ride was silent.

                It only lasted a couple hours before the car stuttered to a stop and the woman let out a sigh.

                “Well I guess this is it boys. We’re still about 80 kilometers from the border, but that’s better than what you were before, yeah? Thank you for riding this last bit with me, it’s get lonely traveling by yourself sometimes. My name’s Diana Faust if you ever want to look me up and come say hi.” She gave them a smile as they all piled out of the car.

                “It was nice meeting you Diana. Thank you so much for the ride,” Feliciano said, truly meaning it.

                She nodded. “The pleasure was all mine. Be careful boys, make sure you stay safe, alright. There have been attacks around these parts recently.”

                “Will do,” Gilbert said, giving her a wave and tucking the gun back into the hem of his pants.

                Turning back around, the three boys started once again back down the road on foot.

                “We still have a few hours before dark. If we keep a good pace we should be able to get some distance tonight and reach the border by tomorrow afternoon.” Gilbert stated, picking up the pace slightly.

                The others followed suit and they were able to make good distance before night fell.

                “We’re going to be in France tomorrow,” Feliciano said excitedly, staying up to take first watch as Ludwig laid down beside him.       

                “Don’t celebrate yet,” Ludwig signed.

                “Oh lighten up Lud! Tomorrow we’ll be free of this awful war! We’ll be safe across the border and on a train to Paris by dinner!” Gilbert cheered.

                “Once we get across the border I want wine to celebrate!” Feli joined.

                “Not that cheap stuff either. Good wine,” Gilbert added.

                “Alright you two,” Ludwig signed, calming them down. “Let’s get some rest or we won’t make it tomorrow at all.”

                Gilbert chuckled. “You’re right. Good night you two.”

                “Good night,” they replied.

                As the brothers settled into sleep and Feli kept watch down the road for potential dangers, a warm bubble of excited hope surrounded the group and for the first time they managed to sleep full and well, knowing that tomorrow, their nightmare would finally come to an end.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

 

**Chapter Fifteen**

“There it is! There’s France Ludwig! I can see it!” Feliciano cried excitedly.

                Ludwig smiled at him and nodded.

                Gilbert let out a loud cheer and laughed out of pure joy.

                “No cars, no soldiers, no planes, made it here pretty easily didn’t we?” he said as they picked up their pace, all but running to the border.

                The area was peaceful. No sign of war, no bodies or gun shots and explosions, no screaming in the distance, no blood stains in the grass. It was nice to see that it hadn’t reached this far South.

                “Stop. Right. There.”

                The border was in sight, they could just make out the sign a few meter’s off, but the familiar voice caused them to pause and slowly turn around.

                Standing only a couple paces off was a teenage girl with a wide stance and gun trained on them with quivering hands. A girl with fire in her eyes, fear, anger, and disdain on her features, and a purple streak in her hair.

                “Maria!” Feliciano cried in shock.

                “Shut up!” she screamed, focusing her aim on him instead of on Ludwig where she originally had it.

                Maria looked like she had seen better days, and the truth was, she probably had. She was caked in mud, dirt and blood from head to toe. Her hair was up in a tangled pony tail and there was a cut of crusted blood across her cheek. Her right hand was in bandages, her clothes were tattered and she was missing a shoe.

                “This is all your fault!” she screamed, her face was flushed with anger and her words dripped acid. “All three of you!”

                “What’s our fault Maria?” Gilbert asked, his hands raised defensively.

                “Everyone died because of you!” she screamed back, causing them all to freeze. Dead? “Iris got an infection in her leg and died a few days later because we couldn’t get her to a hospital, a few days later we were ambushed by a group of soldiers and they killed everyone without even flinching. I managed to escape but I knew this was your fault. If we had never met you this never would have happened. You slowed us down, you rerouted us, we would have been just fine without you!”

                “Maria—“ Gilbert tried but she moved the gun onto him as he took a step forward.

                “Don’t move!” she cried. “I had to find you. It was your fault and I knew you would be here, so instead of going to Belgium, I came here. You were following this road so I knew you would come by eventually. I had to make you pay for what you did to my friends.”

                This was crazy. The girl had completely lost it and it was clear that in such an angered state, there was very little they could do to talk her down. Still, they had to try.

                “Maria, think about what you’re saying,” Gilbert said, trying to keep his voice steady. He didn’t dare reach for his gun, she would pull the trigger before he ever touched it.

                “I’ve been thinking about it for days, it’s all I think about now,” she snapped back.

                Ludwig moved slightly to stand in front of Feliciano. Maria didn’t pay any mind as she kept the gun focused on Gilbert.

                “We didn’t kill Adrian and his family,” Gilbert said sternly but keeping his voice gentle. “That was this damn war. Those fucking soldiers that think they can just do what they want because there’s a war going on.”

                “You don’t have any right to say his name!” she snapped. “Don’t think you’re excluded from this. You’re the cause of this just as much as anybody else. You fucking German’s started this war after all. You’re to blame as well.”

                Gilbert felt something boil in his chest but fought it back, now was not the time to lose his temper.

                “Maria,” he said slowly, taking a slow step forward. “We’re trying to get away from this war just as much as you.” Another step. “We’re really sorry for what you been through,” Another step. “But you have to see that we are not the ones you should be blaming.” Another step.

                Maria shook her head. “No, no, no, no, no! It’s you! I know it’s you!”

                Another step.

                Gun fire.

                For several long seconds, everything froze. Then all it once it began moving in slow motion.

                Ludwig and Feliciano watched in horror as Gilbert fell back, red spreading quickly across his chest. Maria watched with wide eyes as Ludwig ran to catch his brother, his mouth open in a silent scream, before she turned and ran. Feliciano screamed, his own voice echoing painfully in his own head.

                Suddenly everything caught up with them and Ludwig was on his knees with Gilbert cradled in his lap. Tears streamed down his face as he threw his back pack to the side and pulled his shirt off to stop the blood flow. The bullet was close to his heart. But it didn’t hit. It couldn’t have. Gilbert was fine. He was too awesome to die like this wasn’t he? Ludwig really wanted to believe it.

                Gilbert struggled to keep his eyes open. Instead of fear, he looked oddly happy.

                “Hey Luddy, you still have that notebook and pen?” he asked.

                Ludwig frowned and nodded, using a hand to pull the items out of his pocket. Gilbert took them and with a weak hand wrote down an address and phone number before handing it back to his brother.

                “That’s where Francis lives. Find him alright?”

                Ludwig shook his head. Never in his life had he longed to speak so much, never in his life had he been so angry that he couldn’t.

                Gilbert smiled. “You gotta be safe, Luddy… you and Feli. You guys have so much out there for you.” He smiled at Feliciano who was on his knees next to Ludwig, sobbing.

                “Pretty awesome… way to go huh?”

                Ludwig could have slapped his brother. He shook his head, looking down at him with pained determined.

                Gilbert laughed. “I guess… you wouldn’t think so, but I would rather go like this… protecting you and Feli like an awesome hero rather… than some boring old man. You’ll tell stories… about me, won’t you? About your awesome… big brother and all the awesome…. things he did?”

                Ludwig slowly nodded, tears streaming heavily down his face.

                “I’m sorry I couldn’t see France with you. I was really looking… forward to that wine….”

                His eyes drifted closed and Ludwig shook him, causing his eyes to open again.

                “Smile… for me… Luddy. You and Feli… I… I want to… see it…” he whispered.

                Ludwig didn’t know how he could follow such a request, everything hurt, the world was ending in such a different way than it had been before, a smile seemed like such a distant and impossible thing. But still, for Gilbert, he had to try.               

                Their tear stained smiles were weak and hardly counted as real, but it was enough. They held them until Gilbert’s breath left him and he fell still with a small smile of his own.

                Ludwig wanted to scream, but of course, when he opened his mouth, no sound came out, so instead he hugged his brother to his chest and just sobbed, cursing everything that had brought them to this point.

                Feliciano let out a wail that would cause anyone to give him space and for several long minutes they both just sat there, sobbing, wailing, mourning the loss of their brother and friend.

                He was unsure of how long this had lasted, but when Feliciano stood again, his legs were numb and sore, his throat dry as he hiccupped with the remainder of his sobs and his eyes were raw with tears.

                Clearing his eyes of stray tears, he pulled his back pack from his back and dropped it to the ground and pulled his flags free.

                “I’m going after her.”

                Ludwig looked up at shock and grabbed his hand, shaking his hand, everything about him begging Feliciano to stay.

                Feliciano shook his head and kneeling beside Ludwig, pressed the flags into his hand. “No Ludwig, this time, I’m not going to run away.” He gave him a weak smile and leaned forward to press a wet kiss to the German’s cheek. “I will come back, I promise.”

                With that, he stood and turning, ran off after the person that had killed his closest friend.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

**Chapter Sixteen**

                Feliciano ran quickly and with determined steps. He knew that Maria had had a rather large head start, but regardless, it only took a few minutes for Feliciano to find and catch up with her in a small clearing to the side of the road after getting close enough to follow the sounds of her sobs.

                Another gun shot went off as Feliciano approached and he froze for a moment before stepping towards her more cautiously. Maria screamed, a sound filled with anger, pain, loss and fear.

                Feliciano’s own anger was simmering down in his chest. He had never felt so furious before at someone.  Still he kept it locked up and when he called out to her it was with a gentleness he was unaware he still had.

                “Maria.”

                She finally looked up at him as if just noticing him for the first time. “Get away Feliciano,” she called.

                “No,” Feli called back with determination. “You killed Gilbert. You shot my friend and he died!” he cried, the words caught in his throat but he forced them out with a fury.

                “He-he deserved to die!” Maria yelled, turning her gun on Feliciano. “It’s his fault, it’s all his fault!”

                Feliciano snapped. With a cry he launched himself at Maria and attempted to wrestle the gun from her. The gun fired twice, narrowly missing him both times before he managed to get the firearm into his grasp and get Maria pinned beneath him.

                Panting heavily, he aimed the gun at her head, his hand shaking. She stared back up at him, not daring to move, eyes wide.

                “I should kill you. You killed him. You killed Gilbert. He was my friend!” Maria flinched as Feliciano’s hand twitched. “You deserve to die, Maria. I can’t forgive you. I never will. You’re heartless and you hurt not only me but Ludwig as well. Do you even feel anything for what you’ve done? I should kill you, Maria, put a bullet in your head the way you put one in his chest. If not for me, for Ludwig.”

                Maria didn’t say a word as Feliciano sat on top of her, pinning her to the ground, gun trained at her forehead. Her expression was unreadable.

                Feliciano waited, for what, he wasn’t sure, but finally Maria spoke. Her voice just softer than Feliciano expected, more resigned.

                “Perhaps I do deserve to die just as much as anybody else,” she stated. “But what right do you have to pull the trigger Feliciano?”

                Feliciano let these words sink in as his finger closed over the trigger.

                There was no gun fire.

                The Italian pulled back. Standing and letting Maria do the same in silence.

                Maria looked at him confused, unsure what she should do.

                “Leave Maria,” he said, his tone dark as he stared straight at her, every word piercing. “Run away and never find me again. You will never be forgiven, not in a million years and I want you to remember that. Remember how this was the day you shot and killed a man without cause, without guilt. Remember this as the day I let you go to live with that.”

                Maria stared at him for several moments, eyes wide before turning and running away as fast as she could.

                Letting out a sob he didn’t realize had been building up deep in his chest, Feliciano dropped the gun and stood there for a moment and let everything wash over him.

He took his time returning back to Ludwig and by the time he reached him, it was already growing dark.

Ludwig stood on the side of the road, using the shovel they had brought to dig a large hole beneath a tree. He looked up when he heard Feliciano’s shuffled footsteps and immediately dropped the shovel to rush to him.

Wrapped up into the warm safety of Ludwig’s arms, Feliciano broke again into the sobs he had finally managed to subdue.

“I’m s-sorry Ludwig, I f-failed you. I failed Gilbert...” he choked out into Ludwig’s shoulder.

Ludwig pulled back to look at Feliciano, his eyes demanding an explanation.

“I didn’t do it. She got away. I… I let her go.”

Ludwig’s eyes softened and keeping an arm around Feliciano he pulled the notebook out of his pocket. He dropped the embrace to write quickly on a blank page and hand it to Feli.

_‘You did right. I don’t want that on you. Don’t be like her. The last thing we need is more deaths.’_

This seemed to calm Feliciano a little and after a few more minutes of comfort from Ludwig, he was reduced to sniffles.

“What’s the hole for?” Feliciano asked.

Ludwig’s expression went grim and he answered only by pointing at Gilbert’s body where it lay next to the hole.

Feliciano frowned. “We can’t bring him to France?” he asked.

Ludwig shook his head and Feliciano found he wasn’t surprised. He wasn’t sure what he was thinking, they couldn’t exactly bring a dead body across the border with them, no matter what the relation.

A moment later he felt Ludwig nudge him with the notebook.

_‘We will bury him here for now and when this war is over, we’ll come back and give him a proper burial.’_

                Feliciano nodded and handed the notebook back.

                “Can I help?” he asked.

                Ludwig nodded and handed him the shovel from Gilbert’s bag and together they finished digging the grave and lowered Gilbert in as gently as possible.

                Blindly, they both filled the hole back in, avoiding looking in as much as possible.

                Once the man was completely buried they both stood beside the grave in silence before Feliciano began to speak, his voice shaking as the words spilled forth on their own accord.

                “I didn’t know you very long, but we’ve been through more together than most friends go through in a life time. All three of us have. You were very special to me. Not in the same way Ludwig is, but in your own way. You welcomed me and protected me and cared for me as part of your family. You were a great friend and very brave right up to the end. I liked hearing your stories of when you and Ludwig were kids and I really didn’t care how often you bragged about how awesome you were. Gilbert, I’ll miss you, the world will be quieter without you. I’ll miss your smile and your positivity. Most of all, I’ll miss the way you cared. I’m glad you died happy and that I got to see you die with a smile on your face.”

                Unable to make say anymore. Feliciano held back tears, refusing to cry anymore that day as Ludwig gave his hand a squeeze before dropping and giving his own small speech. In the dark, Feliciano couldn’t even pick out the words he knew, but he was a little happy for that, it may have been selfish, but he really didn’t want to know what Ludwig was saying. It was a private moment and he had had enough with sad words for the day.

                Once Ludwig was done, they both stood there for a few moments longer before Ludwig fished out the flashlight from his bag and turning it on, handed it to Feliciano. He moved Feliciano’s hand to point the beam at the tree that headed Gilbert’s temporary grave and motioned for him to hold it there.

                Stepping around the grave, Ludwig pulled a knife out of his pocket and engraved the letters ‘G’ and ‘B’ into the tree trunk.

                “Gilbert said before that we were on the side of survivors,” Feliciano said quietly once Ludwig finished. “Funny how the war’s twisted even that. Even the survivors are turning on each other like we aren’t all fighting for the same thing.”

                Ludwig nodded and gathering their things back up they headed once more for the boarder.

                A chirping sounded from above them and shining the light towards the source of the sound, Feliciano watched as a small yellow bird came and landed on Ludwig’s shoulder.

                “Is that Gilbird?” Feliciano asked in shock. Gilbert had talked about the bird a few times on their journey, and always did so fondly. They had wondered what happened to the creature after it had disappeared shortly after the plane crash back in Ludwig’s hometown. “It has to be, no bird would be that friendly so randomly, and it looks just like him.”

                Ludwig nodded and stroked the small bird’s head as it gave a sad chirp, fluttering over to hop around on the freshly turned dirt not far from where they were standing.

                They  watched the bird for a few minutes before it finally returned to Ludwig’s shoulder and they started down the road once more.

                The night was quiet, and as they finally crossed the border, there was no celebration; there was no change in the air, or fireworks in the sky. There were no words spoken or yells of triumph. With grief weighing heavy on their shoulders, there was just nothing.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

It was approaching on early morning when Ludwig and Feliciano finally made it to the train station. Not a word was spoken as they waited before finally buying their tickets and boarding the train.

                As they pulled away from the station, neither of them mentioned Gilbert or anything that had transpired over the last month as Feliciano took his seat with Ludwig sitting across from him.

                It was only a few hours to get to Paris, but still, Feliciano slept, woken several times by nightmares. Every time he woke Ludwig was still awake, staring out the window at the scenery that whisked by.

                After about an hour, Feliciano gave up on sleeping and joined Ludwig in his silent staring.

                Another hour passed before Feliciano finally spoke. “This doesn’t feel right Ludwig,” he said in almost a whisper. “We’re safe now, the war can’t get us here. Why don’t I feel happy? Why do I feel like we’re still running, still hiding? It isn’t right.” He turned to look at Ludwig who turned to face him as well.

                Ludwig didn’t answer. He didn’t have one to give.

                “I’m still scared Luddy.”

                The statement was barely heard, but it finally had Ludwig moving from his seat and moving over to sit close to Feliciano. He took his hand and while nothing was said, Feliciano took a great comfort in his presence.

                He leaned heavily into Ludwig who pulled away a moment to get something out of his bag. Pulling free the flags that Feliciano had given him only hours earlier, he passed them back to the younger man who took the flag of green, white and red, but pushed the white flag back away.

                “Thank you, but I don’t need it any more. I’m stronger than I used to be. I have something I need to protect.”

                Ludwig gave him a strange look but put the flag away back in his bag as Feliciano twirled the Italian colors between his fingers.

                Feliciano snuggled slightly into Ludwig’s side as the German put his arm around him almost protectively. The Italian looked up from his flag to catch his reflection in the window. Reaching up, he gently touched the bandage Ludwig had tied over his left eye, a wave of sadness passing through him.

                Ludwig shifted, gently taking hand and ducking his head to lightly press his lips to the bandage.

                There was a moment of hesitation before he moved down and pressed those same lips to Feliciano’s.

                There was a gentle gasp that came from the Italian and while the kiss was anything but extraordinary, it was just what Feliciano needed. Quiet, peaceful, loving and full of words that Ludwig would never say. It lasted but a second but no more than that was needed.

                Ludwig gave Feliciano a weak smile and while it was full of sadness, it still filled the younger man with a flicker of warmth. Nestling comfortably into Ludwig’s side, the two of them rode the rest of the trip in sad but comfortable silence.

~~~

                It was a sunny day in Paris when they finally arrived and despite being a beautiful city, it didn’t hold the splendor for Ludwig and Feliciano as it should have.

                Pulling the address from his pocket, the studied it for a moment before finding a map of the city. A few arguments and a set of directions from a nice store clerk later had the duo on the bus in the direction of Francis’ house.

                When they arrived an hour later, they checked the address one last time before knocking on the door of the quaint abode.

                Moments later a tall man with blonde hair that reached his shoulders and the light semblance of a beard opened the door, looking mildly surprised to see them. And who could blame him? Standing on his doorstep were two young men looking worse for wear with dirt and blood caking their clothes, rips and tears in the fabric, cuts, scratches and bruises littering their bodies. Heavy eyes and sagged shoulders only added to the picture of those who had been through much more than they probably ever should be put through in ten life times.

                Blinking Francis quickly ushered them inside and closed the door behind them.

                “Would you look at you two! My lord! We’ll get you fixed up and fed right away. You boys look absolutely exhausted!” The man switched between French and English as he rambled on and fussed around them. Ludwig and Feliciano took it silently, following the Frenchman into the kitchen where he sat them at the table and began searching through the cupboards and throwing whatever food he could find on the table.

                After about 15 minutes of this, Francis finally paused and turned to look at the two young men sitting silently at his table, slowly eating the food he had laid out for them.

                “Hold on. Where’s Gilbert?” he asked.

                Feliciano dropped his food and his lips quivered before he burst into tears. Ludwig good a deep breath before tossing a bowl across the kitchen in a silent display of anger.

                Francis jumped, staring at them in shock. While he wasn’t expecting such a reaction, it took him only a moment to figure out why it had come to be.

                “Oh… my…” he whispered, leaning against the counter as a hand flew to his mouth. His face had gone pale and his eyes quickly lost the shine they had held only moments before. “If…. If you would excuse me just a moment,” he said softly, his words muffled by his hand. He didn’t wait for an answer, walking swiftly from the kitchen.

                Ludwig grabbed for another dish but a soft hand stopped him from throwing it. Looking up he met eyes with Feliciano who shook his head. “Please don’t Ludwig,” he said softly, obviously fighting back the tears that continued to defy him and stream easily down his face.

                Ludwig frowned and quickly turned, pulling Feliciano into his arms where he cried silently for the next several minutes.

                Sometime later, after everyone had regained some semblance of composure, Francis returned and pulled an apron from the hook next to the fridge.

                “Why don’t you boys go wash up, yes? And I’ll make some real food. A dinner fit for a king,” he gave them a smile and they nodded, standing from the table.

                “You go first Ludwig,” Feliciano said softly. Ludwig looked unsure but Feliciano gave him a comforting smile and he agreed.

                “Bathroom is the first room on your right, take your time, there’s plenty of hot water and I’ll make sure to keep dinner warm,” said Francis.

                “Can I use your phone?” Feli asked once Ludwig had disappeared down the hall.

                “Of course dear, it’s right over in the room across the hall,” Francis answered, motioning towards the door way.

                Feliciano thanked him and easily found the phone before dialing Lovino’s number.

                Lovino answered on the second ring.

                “Hello?”

                “Fratello,” Feliciano said. He hadn’t realized how much he had missed hearing his brother’s voice.

                “Feli? Feliciano? Is that you? Is that really you? Oh my god, Feliciano! Where are you, you bastard?! What happened? Are you alright? Are you safe? Where the hell have you been? How dare you make me worry! Do you know how scared I was? Why didn’t you call earlier?”

                Feliciano allowed himself to smile lightly and let the string of questions go on for about a minute or two more, waiting calmly for his brother to finish, simply enjoying hearing his voice again. If he didn’t know better he could have sworn that Lovino was crying.

                Once the rambling had died down, Feliciano took the chance to explain himself and apologize profusely.

                They stayed on the phone and talked until Ludwig finally came out of the shower. He quickly gave Lovino the address and after establishing the older Vargas brother would be there in two days’ time with his boyfriend, Feliciano promised to keep in contact and ended the conversation.

                After turning the water back on and stepping in, Feliciano took Francis up on his word and stayed in the water for as long as possible, washing away, dirt, sap and blood, letting the heat relax every sore muscle in his body. He came to dinner over an hour later feeling, much better, refreshed and energized, despite still being rather exhausted.

                As they ate dinner, Francis was as doting and friendly as possible and by the end they ended up talking as happily and as casually as any old friends would. Gilbert was never mentioned.

                When they headed to bed that night, Francis let them borrow some clean clothes that were a little small on Ludwig but seemed to fit Feliciano right enough.

                Ludwig crawled into bed first and after a moment of hesitation, Feliciano joined him. Ludwig did not protest, instead, he wrapped an arm around the smaller man and pulled him firm and close.

                They laid like that for a while before Feliciano determined he couldn’t sleep and shuffling from the bed, found his old pants and pulled a very worn and stained folded piece of paper from the back pocket.

                Returning to bed and working his way back into Ludwig’s hold, he unfolded the paper revealing the map Ludwig had drawn the first time they had met.

                Ludwig sat up slightly, looking at Feliciano with confused shock.

                “It’s the map you drew me when we first met and you were trying to show me how to get back to my apartment.”

                “I know, why do you still have it?” Ludwig signed.

                “I like to keep it as a reminder,” Feliciano said, eyes tracing over the lines and arrows that were etched across the page. “A reminder of times before the war, of when things were more happy and innocent. When I first decided to keep it, it was because I hoped I would get to see you again, even though we had only met the once and I did all the talking.” He laughed lightly and folded the paper back up, setting it on the small table beside the bed and turning off the lamp before turning back over to face Ludwig.

                “It’s over now, isn’t it Luddy?”

                Ludwig nodded, pressing a warm kiss to Feliciano’s forehead as the younger man’s eyes slowly drifed close.

                It was most certainly over.

 

 


	18. Chapter Eighteen

 

**Chapter Eighteen**

When Lovino and Antonio arrived two days later, everyone was emotional. Feliciano finally admitted his relationship with Ludwig to his brother and while annoyed, Lovino was accepting. Meanwhile. Antonio was overjoyed.

                Lovino quickly got onto the subject of Feliciano returning to Italy, and he only agreed on one condition, that Ludwig come with him. They had been through too much recently to be separated so soon.

                It was agreed that Lovino, Antonio, Feliciano and Ludwig would all settle in the Vargas’ summer home in Southern Italy.

                A little over a month later, the war ended almost abruptly and Gilbert’s body was moved to a proper grave and Feliciano and Ludwig returned to Germany for the first time since their escape.

                It was a small funeral, with a few of Gilbert’s closest friends that could make it. Neither Ludwig nor Feliciano gave any speeches. They had already said what they needed to and had started the slow and painful process of moving on.

                Every year after that, Ludwig and Feliciano would return to Germany to visit Gilbert on his birthday. There were too many bad memories to visit much more than that. It had been Feliciano’s idea to visit on his birthday rather than the day of his death to ‘remember how lived and not how he died’ as he liked to put it.

                Four years passed in relative peace and one sunny summer day had Feliciano hastily trying to tie a tie, as shaking fingers fumbled with the cloth.

                He was more fidgety than normal, whining slightly as he screwed up once again and was forced to start over.

                “Wedding is in fifteen minutes,” a man called from the doorway before disappearing down the hall.

                Huffing lightly, Feliciano started to tie the tie again when large hands came from behind him and swiftly tied it for him.

                Looking up at Ludwig in the mirror, Feliciano grinned and turned around to wrap his arms around the taller man’s neck and step up onto his tip toes to kiss him happily.

                “We’re going to be late,” Ludwig signed, breaking the kiss and taking his hand. With his free one, he pulled the black eye patch out of his pocket and handed it to Feliciano. The Italian was supposed to wear it whenever he wasn’t sleeping, but ended up only wearing it whenever he felt like it and therefore Ludwig was constantly reminding him.

 The Italian sighed and fastened it over his eye quickly before speaking.

                “Then let’s hurry,” he said, pulling the German out the door and into the church.

                Minutes later, Feliciano stood proudly next to his brother, beaming as Lovino and Antonio promised each other forever.

                “Do you think that will be us some day?” Feliciano asked after the wedding as he sat with Ludwig at a small table, a gentle breeze rustling the canopy above them. He sipped at some red wine while he watched Antonio tease Lovino red.

                Ludwig shrugged. “If you want,” he sighed once Feliciano looked at him.

                Feliciano smiled. “I think I do.” He was silent for a moment finishing off his wine before setting down his glass and turning his attention back to his brother and new brother-in-law.

                “Forever is nice, isn’t Luddy? Sometimes I think we already have that. The war was hard, but somehow, we always found our way back to each other again.”

                Ludwig smiled and nodded. As a slow song came on the speakers, Feliciano jumped up, pulling Ludwig with him. “Dance with me.”

                Ludwig didn’t argue as he wrapped his arms around the smaller man and swayed with him across the floor.

                “I love you Ludwig,” Feliciano said quietly as he rested his head against Ludwig’s shoulder.

                And though the German was silent, Feliciano knew by the tightening of his grip, that he was saying the same, and always would be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, there you have it. This story has finally come to an end. It made me really sad to finish it but really excited at the same time. I really hope you enjoyed this story, I am sorry it had to end. But fear not! I have two more stories lined up (in the works). A PruCan WWIII fic and another one with Ludwig, Gilbert and a child Feli! ^^ I will start posting them as soon as I have them written so please look out for those! Feel free to message me with any comments or questions and I think you all for your wonderful comments and all of your support!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I post a new chapter every three days so please look forward to more!


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